Short little song I wrote, tell me what you think

[johnbro23]

I just came up with this little riff last night. Its only a verse and just a 4 chord chorus. I kind of like it, but I need some other people's opinions. Its hard to get an honest answer out friends, they always say it sounds good.

Well, take a listen, its only a minute and a half.

http://www.angelfire.com/music5/johnbro23/New_Song.mp3

Let me know what you think :)

[ZosoFlyd]

The riff is pretty cool if not exactly polished, but that chorus sounds really familiar, I just can't put my finger on it.

[johnbro23]

Thanks for the reply. I agree the riff doesn't sound clean yet, it'll take some work. I thought the chorus sounded like a Dispatch song. Either Hey, Hey or Elias. Anyways, I just threw the chorus together to make it more of a complete song. Its somethine to build on.

[stevo]

sounds good, but i agree the guitar needs polishing. it could just be me, but it sounds a bit rushed also

[johnbro23]

Thanks for the suggestion, I'll try to slow it down a little.

[SkaGuitarOAR]

I really like it. Good job! Just polish the guitar and you'll be fine.

[bullox005]

the intro/verse sounds a little like jimi thing. i was messin around on my guitar, and the way i figured it out had a lot of similarities to jimi thing.

don't get me wrong though, sounds good...pretty impressed

good job

[johnbro23]

Yea, I agree, it is really similar to Jimi Thing. The beginning of my verse is the end of Jimi Thing's riff, just backwards. Well, I've been working on it a little more, and I changed a few minor things. I put a drum loop to it and recorded it in Garageband. I think this version sounds ten times better. Here it is:

http://www.angelfire.com/music5/johnbro23/No_Name.mp3

By the way, thanks for all your replys, they've really been helpful.

[stevo]

drum loop works well for this version. the parts with one guitar sound very good. however, when you get the second guitar in there, i just get lost

[wvumascotdmb]

with the drum beat and the second guitar it all makes my head hurt! :(

[DMDream]

i agree with stevo that it might be a little rushed, try slowing down the riff and see how it sounds.

[johnbro23]

with the drum beat and the second guitar it all makes my head hurt! :(

Thanks for the imput and thanks for being honest. I'll agree it does get a little busy when the second guitar comes in. Do you think I should scratch second guitar? Maybe just fix the timeing or make it quieter?

[phil123]

johnbro, i sent you an email...thanks, phil

[johnbro23]

Thanks Phil. You got mail as well.

[stevo]

Thanks for the imput and thanks for being honest. I'll agree it does get a little busy when the second guitar comes in. Do you think I should scratch second guitar? Maybe just fix the timeing or make it quieter?
if you're going to have the second guitar in there doing something solo-ish, the main guitar needs to quiet down into the background to highlight the second guitar.

[maveric29]

links down

[Eric(h)]

no its not. copy and paste the links to your browser window. If that doesnt work, copy and paste them, then add a single space to the end, then go to the link. angelfire sucks for d/l's.

as for the songs - eh. the riff isnt bad, its definatly jimi thing esque but thats not a bother. I think you play it a little too fast and sloppy, and it doesnt go anywhere. the drum machine version is waaaay too cluttered.

[johnbro23]

if you're going to have the second guitar in there doing something solo-ish, the main guitar needs to quiet down into the background to highlight the second guitar.

Thanks for the advice. Maybe I should try to do something more soloish instead of just playing the verse chords up a few octaves.


And as for the link being down, that happens when you have a free angelfire account. You "pay for what you get".