**The Official Hopeless Romantics Thread**

[purplehaze18]

Then im making lots of the right choices. Cause its hard.

[purplehaze18]

Cause i wanted to.

[saintjohnsriver]

It matters who the person is. I think almost everyone looks at money as a factor in who they will like, whether or not they realize it. We do like to look for people with common interests, and that is one with many of us. The biggest problem I see with girls is that they are looking for the guy who will chase after her rather than the intelligent one.

I disagree. Its women that primarily look for the money. Its programed into their genes, going back to our hunter gatherer days.

[Sami22782]

I'm outta here. I have to go shopping, then I'm cooking dinner for myself... I'm making a banquet!!
I truly wish someone were here to share it with me, but that's life.
I may run into you again later, Anthony. And please, don't get angry at me. A lot of this was merely for arguments sake. Take care, friend.

[taphntm]

bye sam

[saintjohnsriver]

I'm outta here. I have to go shopping, then I'm cooking dinner for myself... I'm making a banquet!!
I truly wish someone were here to share it with me, but that's life.
I may run into you again later, Anthony. And please, don't get angry at me. A lot of this was merely for arguments sake. Take care, friend.

Sami, so far you are the only gal on ants I would buy a plane ticket for. Hope that says something.

have a good tomorrow...

[Sami22782]

I disagree. Its women that primarily look for the money. Its programed into their genes, going back to our hunter gatherer days.Don't know what to make of this... maybe you're a bit of a tool.

[taphntm]

I disagree. Its women that primarily look for the money. Its programed into their genes, going back to our hunter gatherer days.
That's what I meant. Women are influenced by the amount of money they make. But I said almost everyone and I take that back. Instead it's "a lot of."

[purplehaze18]

I need counciling from the guy who helps dr. phil

[saintjohnsriver]

Don't know what to make of this... maybe you're a bit of a tool.

Programmed, does not mean you have to act that way. If you have good values, you make choices despite your predispostion.

[saintjohnsriver]

Don't know what to make of this... maybe you're a bit of a tool.

tool? now we are calling names. not nice sami...

[purplehaze18]

I respectfully Disagree. I think that we arent programmed at all. We make choices. They arent set up for us.

[Sami22782]

Oh, I'm glad you cleared that up for me seeing as though I'm so blinded by money. Please stop making assumptions, Anthony. You're making an ass of yourself, and reading about how you think women are, makes me feel a little like an ass too.
Peace, I'm outta here.

[purplehaze18]

See ya, dont worry no one is blinded by money unless its a choice of their own.

[taphntm]

I wish we wouldn't make relationships so complicated. It used to be that a man would see a woman and just talk to her family and they'd get married. Now, whoever invented the concept of "girlfriends" and "boyfriends" should be flogged.

[Sami22782]

Kisses all round.

[purplehaze18]

Everything is confusing. But if you can get through it, then its fun too.

[saintjohnsriver]

Oh, I'm glad you cleared that up for me seeing as though I'm so blinded by money. Please stop making assumptions, Anthony. You're making an ass of yourself, and reading about how you think women are, makes me feel a little like an ass too.
Peace, I'm outta here.

I wasn't talking about you, but women in general, and there are journals written about human behavior that pretty much agree that men and women have things programed into their genes that they are predisposed to. How we overcome the bad predispositions determines our value as people to other people. Men have bad genetic predispositions as well as women, but ours are different...

[taphntm]

Why do we all say men have grown taller? because that's what women prefer, too bad I don't think we're getting smarter, but instead louder. I don't think we can evolve riches, but in the same way women prefer taller men I think they prefer richer men.

[saintjohnsriver]

I'm outta here. I have to go shopping, then I'm cooking dinner for myself... I'm making a banquet!!
I truly wish someone were here to share it with me, but that's life.
I may run into you again later, Anthony. And please, don't get angry at me. A lot of this was merely for arguments sake. Take care, friend.

Actually I think you got angry with me.

[gbs3769]

Daisies stand up on their tip-toes
Clouds tumble over themselves in the sky
And all the pretty horses come runnin’ to her
And even the dust devils pray
That they’ll catch her eye

I haunt her house from the outside
I watch her bake cornbread and talk on the phone
And the wireless on the inside plays a sad sweet song
A mute moonlit statue am I, she waltzes alone

But baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so empty in the head and tied up in the tongue
And baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so green and dumb

The wind ain’t stopped blowin’ since morning
It’s got me froze up on the inside
And I could get warm in the bunk house
And thaw out on coffee and bread

But baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so empty in the head and tied up in the tongue
But baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so green and dumb

I need your government warning
like I need a hole in my head
Well, I won’t shoot your coyotes
And I won’t burn your weeds
Your paycheck won’t fill up this hollow
It won’t die along the ages

But baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so empty in the head and tied up in the tongue
But baby, baby, I could call you baby
If I weren’t so green & dumb

If I weren’t so green & dumb
If I weren’t so green & dumb
If I weren’t so green & dumb

- Matt

[gbs3769]

Tell me true guys. Is it really that hard to approach a girl?
No. It's very easy.

ya'll play games, and we never approach girls in groups
That's not accurate. Groups can be easy if it is a group of all girls.

How do you feel about a girl approaching you?
That's a good thing. It shows that she has the interest in you and that she is direct. I like girls who are direct.

So it took me a total of 10 minutes to judge that gal's agenda...
Of course if she read the paper she would have known exactly how much money you make. So right there it was obvious that she wasn't very well-informed about local events.

- Matt

[Jessica41]

Its time for a girls night out. You know what that means.


It means its time to go barhopping and talk about how there are no worthwhile guys in this town. Funnnn.

[gbs3769]

It means its time to go barhopping and talk about how there are no worthwhile guys in this town. Funnnn.
Have fun. I'm off to power weekend. My buddy becomes a ninja today (gets his black belt) and then I'm going to play some darts with Phil and Traci from Limerick.

- Matt

[saintjohnsriver]

Its time for a girls night out. You know what that means.


It means its time to go barhopping and talk about how there are no worthwhile guys in this town. Funnnn.

Just by way of reference, the fact that you go out in packs means that you discourage any worthwhile guys from approaching you...

[taphntm]

A sad story, by ECH

At first, he swept me off my feet, but I found out that it was only so he would dump me. I was left there, helpless on the pavement until my friends came back and picked me up again. (http://www.serainc.com/images/Truck_Arm.jpg)

[Jessica41]

Just by way of reference, the fact that you go out in packs means that you discourage any worthwhile guys from approaching you...

I'm not going out in pack. I'm going out with my best friend, that's two of us. And really, I mean it when I say this town is full of worthless guys. However, thats beside the point... if a guy can't approach a girl because she is with other people, that's something he needs to work on... I don't see how it's the fault of the girl. What girl goes out by herself anyway?

[Sami22782]

Yes, Jessica. Have a awesome night.

[gbs3769]

Just by way of reference, the fact that you go out in packs means that you discourage any worthwhile guys from approaching you...
I'm still calling bullshit. Not all guys are discouraged by packs of girls. It only heightens the awareness and makes the thrill of the chase that much more enjoyable.

- Matt

[taphntm]

I agree with matt. I think if you're 'in a pack' then you'll tend to get the more outgoing guys. However, if that's not what you're looking for, then that's not what you'll get. I also agree with Anthony in a way. If I was going somewhere to look for a girl I wouldn't look in a group of them. I'd rather they had their fun and look for someone else who's looking for it.

[watchtwrwildcat]

or maybe women go out in packs because they thoroughly enjoy each others' company and aren't actually concerned about trying to pick up men? just a thought.

[Sami22782]

And what a good thought that was.

[taphntm]

or maybe women go out in packs because they thoroughly enjoy each others' company and aren't actually concerned about trying to pick up men? just a thought.
I think that's true less than half the time. If you're talking about going to a club or a bar, but I wouldn't know since I've never been to one.

[saintjohnsriver]

I think that's true less than half the time. If you're talking about going to a club or a bar, but I wouldn't know since I've never been to one.

Amen, brother, amen.

[saintjohnsriver]

I'm still calling bullshit. Not all guys are discouraged by packs of girls. It only heightens the awareness and makes the thrill of the chase that much more enjoyable.

- Matt

Players are not discouraged from the pack mentality. If what you want is a player, fine...

[saintjohnsriver]

I'm not going out in pack. I'm going out with my best friend, that's two of us. And really, I mean it when I say this town is full of worthless guys. However, thats beside the point... if a guy can't approach a girl because she is with other people, that's something he needs to work on... I don't see how it's the fault of the girl. What girl goes out by herself anyway?

It may be full of worthless guys, but there are guys in your town who think the same about the gals.

[Sami22782]

Sometimes I wish there were places only for women.
Whenever I walk through a club, I get at least 10 pinches on my behind. And they aren't soft pinches. These guys do it really hard, and I feel absolutely violated by the time I've gotten through the crowd. And if I was to turn around and ask who did it, show any anger at all, it's like I'm a frigid freak who must be a lesbian.

[saintjohnsriver]

Of course if she read the paper she would have known exactly how much money you make. So right there it was obvious that she wasn't very well-informed about local events.

- Matt

she wasn't concerned with local events. She was concerned with the bottom line.

[taphntm]

I think the club atmosphere would be a horrible place to pick anyone up.

[Sami22782]

she wasn't concerned with local events. She was concerned with the bottom line.:lol Your post said women were only concerned with the bottom line, and mine said men were only concerned with our bottoms!! :lol

[saintjohnsriver]

I think the club atmosphere would be a horrible place to pick anyone up.

I meet the best girls at bookstores and charity events. All I meet is dreck in bars and clubs.

[saintjohnsriver]

:lol Your post said women were only concerned with the bottom line, and mine said men were only concerned with our bottoms!! :lol

most men and most women, I want a gal who is cute with brains

[Sami22782]

I think you guys missed my post on the club warfare

[saintjohnsriver]

I think you guys missed my post on the club warfare

and you missed one of my posts about genetics as well

[taphntm]

I meet the best girls at bookstores and charity events. All I meet is dreck in bars and clubs.
edit:
:thumbsup that is because you are not looking for sex exclusively. I am with you 100%
Maybe I need to read some books... I think I have a couple of books in mind :lol

oh, and I'm also with you 100% on the cute girl with brains. I seem to only get one or the other, or find one who's taken. :BANG

and yes, I've dumped girls just because I wasn't attracted to them. I just can't date someone I'm not attracted to... So sue me.

[saintjohnsriver]

:thumbsup that is because you are not looking for sex. I am with you 100%
Maybe I need to read some books... I think I have a couple of books in mind :lol

not looking for sex at first. I'd like to know something about what I am getting myself into first...

[Sami22782]

and you missed one of my posts about genetics as wellHow does money have anything to do with genetics?

[saintjohnsriver]

women are genetically programed to seek out the best hunter gatherer. It comes from evolution. Men on the other hand are genetically programed to spread their seed around as much as possible. Now that doesn't mean we all act that way, we overcome these dispositions through values, religion, ethics and whatnot.

[Sami22782]

Ok, fair enough.

[saintjohnsriver]

Ok, fair enough.

now you see what I am talking about. dont you get angry with me samatha till you heard me out.

[taphntm]

I think women are programmed to wish for men to impress them, whether it's sweeping them off their feet or making big bucks is the woman's decision.

[Sami22782]

But you were saying that we (women) are practically all cretens. Like I said yesterday, I won't sit here and watch you write posts that I find offensive.

[taphntm]

uh oh, she just said "we" now she's prejudice

[saintjohnsriver]

But you were saying that we (women) are practically all cretens. Like I said yesterday, I won't sit here and watch you write posts that I find offensive.

No I wasn't, and if you think that is what I said that is because you misunderstood what I was saying, which is easy enought to do face to face, let alone through a faceless message board.

[saintjohnsriver]

Example:

My ex from 18 months ago drove 130 miles to go out with me last night. I didn't ask her to. She just asked if she could come. I said yes to a date...

She dumped me for a law partner 18 months ago and recently he dumped her for a younger hotter chick (i found out last night). When she saw the house I am living in now, she wanted to spend the weekend.

I sent her home.

[Sami22782]

uh oh, she just said "we" now she's prejudice
:lol now don't get me started. :)

[saintjohnsriver]

sorry samantha

[taphntm]

Example:

My ex from 18 months ago drove 130 miles to go out with me last night. I didn't ask her to. She just asked if she could come. I said yes to a date...

She dumped me for a law partner 18 months ago and recently he dumped her for a younger hotter chick (i found out last night). When she saw the house I am living in now, she wanted to spend the weekend.

I sent her home.
ohhhhhhhhhhhh that's harsh. Are you sure it was just because she wanted the house?

[Sami22782]

Example:

My ex from 18 months ago drove 130 miles to go out with me last night. I didn't ask her to. She just asked if she could come. I said yes to a date...

She dumped me for a law partner 18 months ago and recently he dumped her for a younger hotter chick (i found out last night). When she saw the house I am living in now, she wanted to spend the weekend.

I sent her home.
That sounds horrible, and I'd hate that to happen to you again.
My ex boyfriend cheated on me twice, the first time was with a prostitute, the second was with a friend of a friend... He broke up with me while I was going through depression, and then broke up with me again another time last year when my grandparents both died. I was "too emotional".
We could continue dissing each other's sex, or we can try to forget the past, and not let it become a barrier for our future.

[taphntm]

:lol now don't get me started. :)
:lol

[taphntm]

That sounds horrible, and I'd hate that to happen to you again.
My ex boyfriend cheated on me twice, the first time was with a prostitute, the second was with a friend of a friend... He broke up with me while I was going through depression, and then broke up with me again another time last year when my grandparents both died. I was "too emotional".
We could continue dissing each other's sex, or we can try to forget the past, and not let it become a barrier for our future.
I don't think Anthony is prejudice. He and I both know that there are both men and women who make bad decisions in life.

edit: they are just different mistakes. Some girls look for money and many guys look for sex.

[saintjohnsriver]

ohhhhhhhhhhhh that's harsh. Are you sure it was just because she wanted the house?

I live in a very nice home less than a mile from the bay and 5 miles from the gulf. When we dated I lived in a crappy apartment near my job to save money. She never wanted to spend the weekend there...

[saintjohnsriver]

That sounds horrible, and I'd hate that to happen to you again.
My ex boyfriend cheated on me twice, the first time was with a prostitute, the second was with a friend of a friend... He broke up with me while I was going through depression, and then broke up with me again another time last year when my grandparents both died. I was "too emotional".
We could continue dissing each other's sex, or we can try to forget the past, and not let it become a barrier for our future.

but I am not dissing any sex. Men can be tools and women can be bitches. That's just life. I think you are great. I must not think all women are bad.

[Sami22782]

I guess not.

[taphntm]

Sami doesn't count because she's an aboriginee.

[saintjohnsriver]

I guess not.

Don't be so sensitive samantha, I like you. We're just having good conversation.

[saintjohnsriver]

I guess not.

I know for a fact that Samantha is a hottie and judging from our corespondence she is damn smart as well. Too bad for me she is on the other fuckin' side of the goddamn world...

[Sami22782]

Sami doesn't count because she's an aboriginee.
Hey! That's not very nice... for anyone. I'm sure the aboriginee's would be offended by that.
We're just having good conversation.
I know, Anthony. I am conversing with you... haha.

P.S. I can only learn more, Ant, and I think that's all we are doing; learning from each other.

[taphntm]

Well I wasn't insulting aboriginees. Only saying they are more likeable than others.

[skatcat]

To be made so much alike, men and women are unique, although both wired totally different. One of the fun parts of the journey of life is learning and understanding more about the opposite sex. Sometimes, unfortunately, not all experiences are good ones.

[Sami22782]

Oh, ok. I get it now.

[saintjohnsriver]

Hey! That's not very nice... for anyone. I'm sure the aboriginee's would be offended by that.

I know, Anthony. I am conversing with you... haha.

P.S. I can only learn more, Ant, and I think that's all we are doing; learning from each other.

what the hell are sausage rolls? I thought you were a veggie?

[saintjohnsriver]

To be made so much alike, men and women are unique, although both wired totally different. One of the fun parts of the journey of life is learning and understanding more about the opposite sex. Sometimes, unfortunately, not all experiences are good ones.

Correctamundo! but most exeriences with the opposite sex are pretty bad overall, till you find someone you can live with.

[skatcat]

I disagree, I've had many more good experiences than bad. Everyone is different, depends on maturity level and how you handle things i think.

[saintjohnsriver]

I disagree, I've had many more good experiences than bad. Everyone is different, depends on maturity level and how you handle things i think.

how many relationships have you had?

[Sami22782]

what the hell are sausage rolls? I thought you were a veggie?No, I'm not a vegetarian. I love a good, thick, juicy steak.
Sausage rolls are minced meat, usually pork, oats, herbs, heaps of good stuff, rolled into pastry. Served with tomato sauce, it's the closest thing to a traditional Aussie meat pie in the bakery.

[taphntm]

haha I didn't know Sami was making sausage rolls

[saintjohnsriver]

No, I'm not a vegetarian. I love a good, thick, juicy steak.
Sausage rolls are minced meat, usually pork, oats, herbs, heaps of good stuff, rolled into pastry. Served with tomato sauce, it's the closest thing to a traditional Aussie meat pie in the bakery.

lunch time?

[skatcat]

relationships? that's pretty broad, how do you define that? or how do you define serious relationships. I have probably more women friends than men friends. I've dated my whole life, along the way been in some relationships that just came to an end. Never really had a traumatic experience, but most people have those somewhere along the way. Guess i'm lucky.

[Sami22782]

^^ Yes, 20 past 12, now.

[Sami22782]

haha I didn't know Sami was making sausage rollsYou gotta read the fine print. :lol

[saintjohnsriver]

relationships? that's pretty broad, how do you define that? or how do you define serious relationships. I have probably more women friends than men friends. I've dated my whole life, along the way been in some relationships that just came to an end. Never really had a traumatic experience, but most people have those somewhere along the way. Guess i'm lucky.

yes you are, skatcat, yes you are. you have been very lucky

[saintjohnsriver]

^^ Yes, 20 past 12, now.

Do they have mcdonalds in Oz?

[Sami22782]

Do they have mcdonalds in Oz?Yeah, only about a million.
I'm a fan...

[skatcat]

McDonalds? Yuck! Death in a bag!

[saintjohnsriver]

Yeah, only about a million.
I'm a fan...

you have the metric system. what do they call a quarter pounder in oz?

[Sami22782]

:lol :lol It's still a quarter pounder. I liked the double quarter pounders, or the half pounders, or the half kilo burger. Half a kilo of meat on one burger would surely make you hurl.

[saintjohnsriver]

do you have taco bell and wendys and burger king?

[Sami22782]

Yes, yes, and yes.
Hungry Jacks is the Oz version of Burger King...

[saintjohnsriver]

do you listen to ABC or Triple J?

[Sami22782]

Triple J

[skatcat]

aren't hungry jacks pancakes? :ugh

[taphntm]

you have the metric system. what do they call a quarter pounder in oz?
:lol dork

[saintjohnsriver]

Triple J
I listen to ABC news all the time, and right now...

[saintjohnsriver]

:lol dork

well royale is french

[saintjohnsriver]

aren't hungry jacks pancakes? :ugh

not in oz

[Sami22782]

aren't hungry jacks pancakes? :ughNo, they're called pancakes. :lol

[saintjohnsriver]

for those of you who have never been to oz, abc is like npr here...

[Sami22782]

my dad listens to the abc, and I do sometimes, but I like music more when I'm driving. Dr. Karl on Triple J is the best 10-12am weekdays, I think.

[saintjohnsriver]

my dad listens to the abc, and I do sometimes, but I like music more when I'm driving. Dr. Karl on Triple J is the best 10-12am weekdays, I think.

what does he play>?

[saintjohnsriver]

my dad listens to the abc, and I do sometimes, but I like music more when I'm driving. Dr. Karl on Triple J is the best 10-12am weekdays, I think.

listening to JJJ? now?

[saintjohnsriver]

If anyone wants to listen to triple J in Oz

http://www.abc.net.au/streaming/triplej.asx

They have a 96k stream and it always sounds better than FM.

[skatcat]

Love it when people get confused!

[saintjohnsriver]

who is the chick on Triple J now? Must only be on the weekends.

[Sami22782]

No, I'm not.

Now I am.

[saintjohnsriver]

some rap song playing i never heard on american radio with someone Whistling

[Sami22782]

Yes. The occasional good song comes on.
I heard 'American Baby' played behind an interview the other day. That was cool.

[saintjohnsriver]

this is a good song

[Sami22782]

so is this one... Spiderbait

[taphntm]

I wish our radio played good music. But I guess they haven't figured that out yet.

[Sami22782]

now she's talking shit

[Sami22782]

Hard to believe: Australia was the third country after the USA and Russia to launch a satellite into orbit.
Easy to believe: Tally Ho is Australia's finest rolling paper.

[skatcat]

...speaking of russian....think i'll make me a white russian, been craving one.

[saintjohnsriver]

now she's talking shit

why?

[Sami22782]

did you hear that Butterfingers song? I love it.

[saintjohnsriver]

half the stuff I hear on triple j we never hear in america

[Sami22782]

yeah, right. I was going to say before that they tend to play a lot of underground music, because of the number of commercial radio stations.

[purplehaze18]

Hows everyone tonight?

[Sami22782]

^^ Well, thanks, though it's quarter past 2 on Sunday Arvo here.
How's your night been?

[saintjohnsriver]

yeah, right. I was going to say before that they tend to play a lot of underground music, because of the number of commercial radio stations.

that's why I love JJJ. I first heard of the Church on JJJ.

[Sami22782]

And they play heaps of Australian music too.

[saintjohnsriver]

And they play heaps of Australian music too.

the church is austrialian

[Sami22782]

I'll be back. Just going out for a cigarette.

[Sami22782]

the church is austrialian:lol well there you go. Shows how much I know about The Church.

[saintjohnsriver]

you never heard of the church?

[Sami22782]

Heard of, can't place their music.

[skatcat]

mmmmm....cigarette and beer right now is guuuuuuude!

[saintjohnsriver]

Heard of, can't place their music.

hang tight, I'll email you something.

[Sami22782]

I'm going to sign off. Have to do some things around the house before it gets too late. I'll talk to you all soon.

[saintjohnsriver]

ok samantha

[Sami22782]

Bye, Ant.

[gbs3769]

I've definitely had more good experiences than bad. Sure, I've had some bad endings and things like that, but I've definitely had good experiences.

Sorry, I just realized this was on one of the much earlier pages... you can all ignore me.

- Matt

[Sami22782]

:lol
I've had good experiences and I've had bad experiences. I try not to judge them by their outcomes, much like yourself, it seems. I believe that their isn't an 'ultimate' partner. I believe it's trust, compatability, major compromise, that make a relationship work. I could have a ten year relationship with someone, but that doesn't nessesarily mean I'll be with them for the rest of my life.
It's sad to admit that, but I think it's kinda helping me move on from my past relationships.

[defcon]

I went to a high school classmate's graduation party (for college) the other day, and the gossip started flying about what people were up to, how life was, etc. - in summation about 1/3 of my class is married, 2/3 have children or are going to have children, and essentially everyone except me has a significant other. So I officially join this chat thread.

I wouldn't call my situation hopeless, I'd call it a lost cause. When I was younger (college) all I cared about was having someone there for the bed scene, but now it's more like I just want someone for a companion - I guess I'm starting to feel lonely. Sure, there are great benefits to seeing a member of the opposite sex (or same sex, whatever floats your boat) which I won't go into here, but after awhile that gets old and it's just fun to have your best friend at your side at all times.

That's really all I want out of a relationship. I don't care about the sex anymore, I don't care about going out and getting smashed and dragging home just any old thing. It's just frustrating. Especially since I'm moving around alot right now - I just wish I had one stable thing in my life.

/end rant

[gbs3769]

And what I want to be is amazing to your heart and mind girl
Wish I could read your mind I know that I would find a love inside girl
And sometimes words will die but the sincerity never will

Why can't I be there darling
Why can't I be there holding on
It's a million miles from here to the moon

In my mind
In my heart
It's like walking, walking from here...when you're walking from here to the moon

And what my eye can see is amazing to my heart and mind girl
Wish you could read my mind I know that you would find a love inside girl
And sometimes words will die but the sincerity never will

Why can't I be there darling
Why can't I be there holding on
It's a million miles from here to the moon

In my mind
In my heart
It's like walking, walking from here...when you're walking from here to the moon

And if the moon just up and fell from the sky
Just say goodnight moon and please don't make me cry
Yeah I see you there with your stars up above
Yeah I see you there but you're a million miles away

In my mind
In my heart
It's like walking, walking from here...when you're walking from here to the moon

- Matt

[gbs3769]

I cried when that came on my shuffle on the way home from my parents house today. Even now, I'm getting teary-eyed.

Why is it so hard to forget.

- Matt

[saintjohnsriver]

Tiny baby, so naive
I can't believe what you believe
You were once so happy here

It may not be Eden or summer in Greece
You may not even find the Golden Fleece
In the drag of this atmosphere

Now I don't want to bring up a delicate matter
No I'd much rather bribe or flatter you
'Cause flattery gets me everywhere

But you punctured my tires, you crossed all my wires
I brand your acolytes as a pack of liars
And the fire's singing everywhere

Buckle like a wreck on the cold green sea
Like you were a ripple in my memory

I leant you some collateral to buy new clothes
It went out the window and up your nose
And that's the end of the honeymoon

Yeah we walked down the aisle for another mile
I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles
And you can have all the money soon

You're so deluxe, you're so divine
You're so fifty light years ahead of your time
You're a riddle, you're a ripple

You're the human sacrifice to the goddess of ice
Your hairdo is full of diamonds and lice
And you're hardly off the nipple

Another little glitch in continuity
Like you were a ripple in my memory

[saintjohnsriver]

Whatever makes you happy
Is exactly what you will wear
I wouldn't dream of changing you
For a minute or in a year
Whatever makes you happy
Is exactly how you will stay
Whatever makes you happy
Is okay

Whatever made you hungry
Is the one thing you have found
You're starving for affection
I guess sex just lets you down
Whatever made you turn away
It's a shame it made you late
For whatever makes you happy
I don't care
Let it wait

You make me nervous
You make me jealous
You make me wonder when you lie
You make me want to vomit
And I promise
I want you 'til the day I die

Whatever makes you famous
Ain't contagious
Please don't run
You're falling down a stairwell
Calling farewell anyone
Whatever makes me lonesome
It's the same that sets you free
Now whatever makes you happy
I'm pretty sure
Isn't me

[wildflower]

I went to a high school classmate's graduation party (for college) the other day, and the gossip started flying about what people were up to, how life was, etc. - in summation about 1/3 of my class is married, 2/3 have children or are going to have children, and essentially everyone except me has a significant other. So I officially join this chat thread.

I wouldn't call my situation hopeless, I'd call it a lost cause. When I was younger (college) all I cared about was having someone there for the bed scene, but now it's more like I just want someone for a companion - I guess I'm starting to feel lonely. Sure, there are great benefits to seeing a member of the opposite sex (or same sex, whatever floats your boat) which I won't go into here, but after awhile that gets old and it's just fun to have your best friend at your side at all times.

That's really all I want out of a relationship. I don't care about the sex anymore, I don't care about going out and getting smashed and dragging home just any old thing. It's just frustrating. Especially since I'm moving around alot right now - I just wish I had one stable thing in my life.

/end rant

Everyone changes with age, and I think thats why its harder to find someone when your older. Older people (or should I say wiser) are looking for something different than the people who are usually available to date. It is very frustrating!

[saintjohnsriver]

I cried when that came on my shuffle on the way home from my parents house today. Even now, I'm getting teary-eyed.

Why is it so hard to forget.

- Matt

Let me quote one of my favorite movies...

"Now that's a hard motherfuckin' fact of life. But it's a fact of life your ass is gonna hafta get realistic about."

you just gotta learn the poker face and deal. If you want a clue to how the other side play's the game, read "the rules."

[gbs3769]

This was something new. I've been doing so well for the past four months.

- Matt

[wildflower]

It sucks trying to let someone go, but I can tell you that it does get easier. It just takes awhile. Its been almost a year for me, and I still have my moments, there just not as frequent.

[gbs3769]

Yeah, this was my first moment. I'm not really sure why the song brought it out in me either because it is not like it was anything like "our song" or anything to that effect.

- Matt

[saintjohnsriver]

is that the chick on you av?

[gbs3769]

No. The girl in my avatar is Julie (see the "Gotta love my girlfriend" thread.

- Matt

[ryguy178]

No. The girl in my avatar is Julie (see the "Gotta love my girlfriend" thread.

- Matt
That causes so much confusion. If only people would do their research.

[wildflower]

It doesn't have to be anything specific to set off a moment. Some mornings I wake up and just know something will make me have a moment. I cried at Alpine a few weeks ago when dave played #34, and I didn't even see it coming. I'm sure the beer didn't help!

[gbs3769]

Im changing my avatar soon. So people won't get confused.

- Matt

[Jessica41]

I have those moments too sometimes. They do become far less frequent over time. lots of time.

[UNC41]

I've got no idea what's going on. She called me two days in a row last week to go to a movie, which I ended up doing the second night. Then today I was calling every girl I know to get ideas for my parents 25th, so I called her to get some input. While when she calls me back she told me she was going to invite me on the river with her family today but they didn't go out for long, and then she called me tonight to see what I was doing.

[Jessica41]

I've got no idea what's going on. She called me two days in a row last week to go to a movie, which I ended up doing the second night. Then today I was calling every girl I know to get ideas for my parents 25th, so I called her to get some input. While when she calls me back she told me she was going to invite me on the river with her family today but they didn't go out for long, and then she called me tonight to see what I was doing.

Sounds like she may want to be back in your life.

[UNC41]

What I wouldn't give for that to be the case. Right now I'm being a little pessismistic about the situation so my hopes don't get up too high.

[Jessica41]

Good thinking.

[UNC41]

Things only began to change in our relationship when we came home this summer from college. Her parents took away a lot of the freedom she had a college when she came home and part of me thinks that had a lot to do with getting that freedom back by not having a boyfriend. We're both moving back next week and I have no idea what that will bring.

[Jessica41]

Yeah, this was my first moment. I'm not really sure why the song brought it out in me either because it is not like it was anything like "our song" or anything to that effect.

- Matt

Sometimes my moments come from nowhere. Other times I do it to myself when I am organizing the pics on my computer and I purposefully click into the folder with pictures of my ex and I. I know it gets me everytime, but maybe I do it in hopes of looking in there and not being affected by it.

[Sami22782]

It's funny how often you do that, and it doesn't work ^^

All of my former partners hold a place in my heart and my memories. SOme are really great, while others are not so great. It's been about 3 months since I broke up with my boyfriend, and at the worst of times I feel alone, depressed, cheated and mistreated. At the best of times, I'm glad he's not longer in my life.
You got into it one day at a time; you'll get yourself out of it one day at a time.

[selkiegirl]

Everyone changes with age, and I think thats why its harder to find someone when your older. Older people (or should I say wiser) are looking for something different than the people who are usually available to date. It is very frustrating!I think it's easier to find the RIGHT someone as you get older. Yes, you may date alot more in your younger years, but until you go through the good and not so good relationships you become very aware of what you want and what you don't want the next time around.
For me, it helped me to fast forward through all the long, dragged out "is this/could this be love" moments and center in on the things that were most important for me in a relationship. Common goals in life, similiar outlooks about priorities in life, and the huge difference between initial lust versus the potential of a long lasting partnership in love.
When you know exactly what/how you want to feel, to be treated, you simply will not settle for anything or anyone less than that. And when you find him/her, you will not give anything less than your all, because you KNOW how precious that kind of love is.

[Popeye2003]

Ouch, not coming to the Chat Threads this weekend (long story short, I wasn't feeling like talking too much) got me a bunch to read. :p

[Jessica41]

I think it's easier to find the RIGHT someone as you get older. Yes, you may date alot more in your younger years, but until you go through the good and not so good relationships you become very aware of what you want and what you don't want the next time around.
For me, it helped me to fast forward through all the long, dragged out "is this/could this be love" moments and center in on the things that were most important for me in a relationship. Common goals in life, similiar outlooks about priorities in life, and the huge difference between initial lust versus the potential of a long lasting partnership in love.
When you know exactly what/how you want to feel, to be treated, you simply will not settle for anything or anyone less than that. And when you find him/her, you will not give anything less than your all, because you KNOW how precious that kind of love is.

Very well said. :)

[Popeye2003]

On the moments thing... I do have my moments, they were VERY frequent in the first 3 or 4 months, but with time it just becomes more rare. It's been a lil more than a year now, but I consider myself over it. I just remember it sometimes. It was a very short relationship, but it was pretty intense (no pun intended), so it was pretty rough when we broke up.

[Jessica41]

I still have moments after 2 years.

[drmgrl]

Very well said. :)

I agree :p

[watchtwrwildcat]

there's only been one boy that I've ever missed, despite the fact that I was the one with my bags packed. but truthfully, after we ended it, he rarely crossed my mind. occasionally, I'll dream that we're still together and in my dreams he's always just barely out of my reach, just like he was in life. but that's usually the only time he ever sneaks into my mind.....

[taphntm]

I think crying is a sign of doubt. You realize that you want something you can't have. I think that's why I've only lost it maybe twice in the past few months because I ignore my doubt. I also think that crying is somehow the best feeling there is. Letting it go is somehow such a good feeling.

[Popeye2003]

I think crying is a sign of doubt. You realize that you want something you can't have. I think that's why I've only lost it maybe twice in the past few months because I ignore my doubt. I also think that crying is somehow the best feeling there is. Letting it go is somehow such a good feeling.
Letting go in anyway is very good. Doesn't matter if it's crying or punching a "sand bag", it's always good.

[il bacio dolce]

I haven't read since Friday afternoon. I have nothing to offer that makes me in any way hopeless, so far as relationships go, so maybe I should backread and give some responses that may or may not mean a whole lot to whomever they're directed at, but then that's what I always do around here...

I had quite a weekend. Nothing that happened was expected or planned or normal, but I had such a blast and left the place with some new friends and a new appreciation for family and love. :D Life is crazy.

[il bacio dolce]

Crying is a beneficial physiological process that allows people to cope with stress. Studies have shown tears triggered by emotion contain higher concentrations of stress hormones than tears caused by irritants like raw onions. Crying removed excess stress-related chemicals and restores the bod's chemical balance.

That is why you feel a little better after a good :lorraine !!!!

[defcon]

I'm a guy, and I'm not afraid to admit, sometimes I just gotta bawl my eyes out. Usually after I have broken shit and went on a rampage. But that's not necessarily anything to do with romanticism.

Today I was going down the road and "Here I Go Again" by Whitesnake came on. Rock the hell on. "I'm just another heart in need of rescue, waiting on love's sweet charity, and I'm gonna hold on for the rest of my days...cuz I know what it means, to walk alone, on this lonely street of dreams..." I turned it up, flashed the devil sign, and rocked my ass off.

[taphntm]

Crying removed excess stress-related chemicals and restores the bod's chemical balance.

That is why you feel a little better after a good :lorraine !!!!
so, is that what is coming out of our eyes? I don't understand why we get teary eyed when we get upset. What does it have to do with our body? I would really like to know if someone can help me out. I mean, if we get scared we get adrenaline, that makes sense; but how does crying help our bodies. Are we releasing the chemicals through our eyes? Thanks in advance.

[il bacio dolce]

:lol Yes. It's something that our body does, hence has much to do with our bodies!

Hm. Googled crying and all I got was how to deal with a colicky baby!

Hold on... I'm gonna look around. I like researching stuff. :)

[taphntm]

If you were a man I would say "you're the man"

[ryguy178]

so, is that what is coming out of our eyes? I don't understand why we get teary eyed when we get upset. What does it have to do with our body? I would really like to know if someone can help me out. I mean, if we get scared we get adrenaline, that makes sense; but how does crying help our bodies. Are we releasing the chemicals through our eyes? Thanks in advance.
Why do we laugh when we find something humourous?

Why do we cry out when we are in pain?

The bodies physical response to a non-physical and non-palpable thing such as an emotion really is a mystery.

[il bacio dolce]

I would assume just various hormones that are released, whether it expels those that make you stressed or upset, or triggers those that make you feel good (ie, endorphines). I can't find anything that doesn't talk about it as simply a physical response, and that doesn't answer your question.

[il bacio dolce]

If you were a man I would say "you're the man"
I'll call anybody dude. What's your point? :lol

[saintjohnsriver]

Got a box full of letters,
Think you might like to read
Some things that you might like to see,
But they're all addressed to me

Wish I had a lotta answers,
'Cause that's the way it should be
For all these questions,
Being directed at me

I just can't find the time
To write my mind
The way I want it to read

You'll come back again
And I'll still be your friend

I got a lot of your records,
In a separate stack
Some things that I might like to hear,
But I guess I'll give 'em back

I wish I had a lotta answers,
'Cause that's the way it should be
All these questions
Being directed at me

Just can't find the time
To write my mind
The way I want it to read

[taphntm]

I'll call anybody dude. What's your point? :lol
but I don't like to call girls dudes, I called a girl "man" one time by accident

[il bacio dolce]

I can understand a lot of girls not liking that much! :lol

Anthony, are the lyrics you post here random songs or things you write? I don't recognize them and you don't label them.

[jfolden]

I can understand a lot of girls not liking that much! :lol


I don't usually refer to girls as dude. Although, I find it a little odd that this one girl always says goodbye by saying "See you guys later." I mean I sometimes just want to say, "You know, I'm only one person."

[il bacio dolce]

:lol I can see if it were a group of people......... :freak

[jfolden]

But, I'm not a group unless maybe I've got multiple personalities that I'm unaware of. :confused :eek :shrug :cool

[il bacio dolce]

Right, right... :lol

The quote in your sig is like a tragic flaw for most people.. . I've been trying to keep away from that mindset and tell myself that my life is what it is, and I'm just going to let my life take it's course and see where I go and be satisfied with it. Why want some other life more than your own? If it were different it wouldn't be yours. I think when you let that mindset take over, most often everything just goes to shit!

[gbs3769]

However Cassie, there is nothing wrong with having dreams and working to fulfill those dreams.

- Matt

[jfolden]

Actually, I need to find a new quote. I was feeling that quote a few weeks ago when I was trying to decide something, but I've been thinking over the past few days and I think I'm past that. I think I need to stick with what's right there in front of me and not worry about some other possiblities that are may or may not exist just cause they could possilbly be better.

[il bacio dolce]

However Cassie, there is nothing wrong with having dreams and working to fulfill those dreams.

- Matt
I wasn't thinking along those lines. I am speaking in terms of taking for granted the good things you have, wondering if you should just leave the person you love because you've grown comfortable to the extent of boredom and think maybe you'd enjoy being with somebody new. I used to think about leaving my boyfriend, quitting school and leaving the state and never speaking to my family again. Lately I've realized how much I love all those things exactly as they are. I have goals in life, and I don't doubt new ones will come along down the road, I'm just not throwing away the goals I have now or the relationships I have now because I value them so much.

If you guys know one thing about me know I'm going through a big growing up period, I'm always thinking and changing my mind about things and learning, and I use this board as a place to lay out what's on my mind and get feedback. Please don't think of me as someone who thinks she's got it all figured out. I think a lot of people form that opinion of me and dislike me for it. I think a lot and I say what I'm thinking at the moment, so if I say something completely different a week from now I am far from hypocritical.

Lots of free time on my hands today. ;)

[il bacio dolce]

Actually, I need to find a new quote. I was feeling that quote a few weeks ago when I was trying to decide something, but I've been thinking over the past few days and I think I'm past that. I think I need to stick with what's right there in front of me and not worry about some other possiblities that are may or may not exist just cause they could possilbly be better.
It's like my "he doesn't want marriage and children/what if I want them some day" dilemma. :lol I don't need to stress on that right now at all!

I forgot to change the alarm setting last night to wake me up at 6 because I had an 8 o'clock class. Well I woke up at 7:45 this morning. :rolleyes Class would have been over by the time I got downtown!

[davehead34]

However Cassie, there is nothing wrong with having dreams and working to fulfill those dreams.

- Matt

:thumbsup I had a similar thought earlier this morning while I was in the shower. I haven't been taking my classes, like I should be, due to excessive amounts of vacationing and partying. I asked myself if I was letting my dream of becoming a teacher slowly slip away into the future, and I had to answer "yes."

It's extremely easy to become preoccupied with tasks/events that have little to no positive effect on you, and that's pretty much where I'm at right now. For a while, I was going to school full-time (aside from being a Marine on active duty) and was pulling great grades. Then DMB went on tour and I found every excuse in the book to not take classes until October. :shrug I really need to get back on the ball.

On a side note, has anyone else ever struggled with searching for an apartment? I've found the most incredible place ever. Three bedroom house in Ocean Beach, on the beach, two and a half baths, patio, pool table, huge kitchen, deck, loft...everything a man could ever want in an apartment...but I called up the owner and he's telling me they might be using the house for a vacation rental vice long-term lease. This upset me GREATLY.

[gbs3769]

On a side note, has anyone else ever struggled with searching for an apartment?
When I was looking for an apartment, I set up a time with a lady to take a look at an apartment up on Tipperary Hill. I had her set up a time of 5:30 because I knew that I wouldn't be able to make it there before that since I have to work until 5:00 everyday.

So I find the house after driving by it a few times and talk to her son who was sitting outside of the house. Now this guy was complete white trash. I mean, broken down pickup truck with all sorts of stickers on the window. He had NASCAR stickers and the little Calvin stickers on it that are pissing on the logo of rival truck sellers and of course a couple of stickers about how guns are God's gift to mankind. The guy is sitting on the porch to the house with no shirt on and some ratty jean shorts and a ratty old red marlboro hat. He had a beer in one hand and there were kids running around all over the place and riding on scooters and bikes.

So I was already a little sketched out because I wasn't really expecting the neighborhood to be white trash. I waited around a few minutes for my friend to show up and he was running late so I decided to head upstairs and see what the landlord was up to. I get to the top of the stairs and she is in there showing the place to someone else. I didn't really think anything of it since a lot of times these places will end up showing it to more than one person in the same trip so that they don't have to keep on driving out from their house in the suburbs.

The landlord gives me this look like who the hell are you and I tell her my name and tell her that I was there to look at the house at 5:30. She says to me, I'm sorry but you were supposed to be here at 4:30. I just kind of stare at her for a moment and say, "That would be impossible since I have to work until 5:00." She came back over the top and said well you made the appointment. I said to her that she was mistaken and that I was dissapointed by that. She says it doesn't matter since she just got done showing it to someone and that the person had just written a check for the deposit. I sort of chuckled and said, "That's allright, the place is small and looks like a dump," and turned around and left to go to the next house that I was looking at.

- Matt

[davehead34]

That's quite the story, Matt :lol Jesus, it sounds like a nightmare. I hope shopping for houses/apartments is always that eventful. :rolleyes

A friend picked up a magazine with several apartment listings. The only problem is that I don't want to live in an apartment complex, which is exactly what that magazine was selling. While gated communities do sound nice, I'm not particularly interested in moving into a mass-production apartment. Shopping for rooms is more difficult that dating.

[il bacio dolce]

Apartment guides can be found by the entrance to the supermarket, they're free.

[gbs3769]

We decided that we didn't want to do the whole apartment complex either. While complexes have their benefits, it is also much easier to have problems with the people that you live near in a complex than if you have neighbors while renting part of a house.

For my roomate and I, it works out pretty well, the guy who lives upstairs from us happens to work second and third shift so we don't ever have any problems as far as noise is concerned. He's a cool guy and we haven't had any problems over parking or anything like that.

I'll never live in an apartment complex because I just don't like the feel. They are too cookie cutter for me. I want to have my own lawn and my own driveway.

- Matt

[gbs3769]

Apartment guides can be found by the entrance to the supermarket, they're free.
Yes, but those guides only have complexes in them.

- Matt

[il bacio dolce]

Ah. I know guys like you. :lol You don't want neighboors because you don't want to worry about noise....








































...complaints about your noise from your neighboors that is. :lol

[taphntm]

I don't usually refer to girls as dude. Although, I find it a little odd that this one girl always says goodbye by saying "See you guys later." I mean I sometimes just want to say, "You know, I'm only one person."
I don't understand when people say "We'll see ya" It's always one person when they say that... But sometimes when I talk to myself (either out loud or in my head) I say "we will do this," "we will go here," etc... I say things out loud to myself at work a lot "alright, let's go" is one I say a lot... usually it's "2.875, .875, .625 umm" but what bothers me is who I'm talking about...

[davehead34]

I could care less about noise. I've slept through it all. After living in Marine Corps barracks for two and a half years, I don't think there isn't anything:

-I haven't heard
-I haven't seen
-I haven't slept through

Matt's right about the cookie-cutter feel to complexes. I want to have my own lawn, backyard, driveway, etc...Having all of those things gives me a sense of accomplishment, a sense of home, which is important to me. Complexes are nice - I have some buddies living in them - but they're not for me. Everyone seems like a stranger in there. Your neighbors aren't neighbors - they're strangers.

[jfolden]

Ah. I know guys like you. :lol You don't want neighboors because you don't want to worry about noise...

...complaints about your noise from your neighboors that is. :lol

I know what you mean. My damn neighbors are always complaining about the screaming and moaning by those damn women I bring home from the bar. :rolleyes

[il bacio dolce]

Some people like to listen to music loud and party and don't want to bother neighboors (read: have the cops called on them). I like my apartment complex. The apartments and the land they're on are really nice. We have two ponds in back, one we can fish from (if we throw it back!) and one that just looks pretty and you can chill by it and watch the duckies. I sit on my back porch which faces woods and watch birds and chipmunks and the occasional deer or wild turkey! The only thing is all the bugs in the summer.

[il bacio dolce]

I know what you mean. My damn neighbors are always complaining about the screaming and moaning by those damn women I bring home from the bar. :rolleyes
I actually can't compleatly relax.. in bed.. because I know there is a thin wall between our bedroom and the next apartment's bedroom. I know because we often hear music, their alarm clock, someone coughing even! :eek No doubt they'd hear me if I really let loose. :lol

[gbs3769]

I know what you mean. My damn neighbors are always complaining about the screaming and moaning by those damn women I bring home from the bar. :rolleyes
I feel bad for my roomate...

- Matt

[AnyonebutBush]

where is everyone??? Did everyone find a date in the same night:ugh

[dmbosw41]

what happened...owell

[whiteysax]

Greetings all... I just discovered this thread... I seem to be late on everything :p Nonetheless... I felt obliged to join the convo as I haven't had a girlfriend in 2 years now. It will be exactly 2 years in 2 1/2 weeks. In the past year, I've only had 2 dates. I've had my heart set on a fairly specific type of girl that I just haven't found yet... but I know is out there... so I suppose that I could categorize myself as a hopeless romantic. That and I work under the false pretense that all girls go for a traditional, chivalrous guy... which is VERY not the case! Hope you guys are having better luck than me!!:hump

[dmberg]

If I could offer one piece of advise that I have been following for some time now, it would be.... If you are going through hell, keep going!

[whiteysax]

Good advice... I wouldn't consider my situation hell yet (ask me in another 2 years!). But I suppose eventually everyone gets their break.

[dmberg]

Good advice... I wouldn't consider my situation hell yet (ask me in another 2 years!). But I suppose eventually everyone gets their break.

Well hopefully in two years, hell will have come and gone by then!

[whiteysax]

Lol... a fleeting hell... we can only hope so much

[dmberg]

I second that

[skatcat]

should enjoy being single while you can, i am!

[dmberg]

And sometimes being single is good and sometimes its not so good

[skatcat]

depends on the person i guess, how outgoing you are. If you are alone 24-7 well that is no fun.

[dmberg]

Lets hope nobody is along 24/7, that would suck!

[skatcat]

yeah it would, unless they just wanted it that way. Girls seem to be on the prowl as much as guys though.....so shouldn't be a problem.

[dmberg]

yeah it would, unless they just wanted it that way. Girls seem to be on the prowl as much as guys though.....so shouldn't be a problem.

Hmmm..so if women are prowling as much as guys are, how come there are still so many single people out there, including myself?

[karen2829]

ok, I have to put my two cents in this one because I am hopeless ( in love) and a romantic ( I think ?? ) I have been single for almost 3 years and although I do get lonely at times I still think single life is better than being in a crappy relationship in fear of being alone... I do have one question... why is it that guys always say they want someone who is independent, easy going, open minded , no kids, etc. etc... but when it comes down to it, you still pick the single mom with baby daddy drama ??? I don't get it ?? some one please enlighten me ;-)

[Designer43]

Hmmm..so if women are prowling as much as guys are, how come there are still so many single people out there, including myself?

I feel the same way. :shrug

I walk around NYC everday and I'm sure there are thousands of available women, but what do I do, just walk up to them and say "Hey!"?? Yeah, that'll go over well in this city....

[gbs3769]

I walk around NYC everday and I'm sure there are thousands of available women, but what do I do, just walk up to them and say "Hey!"?? Yeah, that'll go over well in this city....
It can. You just have to see a little connection on something and go for it. See a girl wearing a t-shirt of your college, ask her if she went there. See someone with flawless tastes in their outfit, mention it. The smallest things from a ring to shoelaces can be the perfect ice breaker to get you in on a conversation with someone that you may not normally get to talk to.

- Matt

[drmgrl]

It can. You just have to see a little connection on something and go for it. See a girl wearing a t-shirt of your college, ask her if she went there. See someone with flawless tastes in their outfit, mention it. The smallest things from a ring to shoelaces can be the perfect ice breaker to get you in on a conversation with someone that you may not normally get to talk to.

- Matt

Great advice Matt! I guess you're not the Love Hustler for nothin. ;)

[whiteysax]

Yeah, I enjoyed the single life for about 6 months... But I've come to the conclusion that I'm a "relationship" guy... I don't do well dating around... I don't have the personality to pick up a different date every weekend... I don't frequent the bars or clubs (at all)... so I've been hoping for a relationship for the past year and half... just haven't met any new girls. Moved to Texas for a year and was so busy with work I didn't meet anyone new. Moved back to PA and all the girls I know up here are friends... just hasn't happened.

[Designer43]

It can. You just have to see a little connection on something and go for it. See a girl wearing a t-shirt of your college, ask her if she went there. See someone with flawless tastes in their outfit, mention it. The smallest things from a ring to shoelaces can be the perfect ice breaker to get you in on a conversation with someone that you may not normally get to talk to.

- Matt

Actually, I know exactly where you're coming from. Just yesterday I complimented this girl who was wearing stylish pants and she had an overall great sense of style. I couldn't really chat since I was already late for a meeting; but I see her almost everyday on the Path train, so the next time I see her, I'll strike up some more conversation as see where it goes.

Thanks for the advice though. :thumbsup

[jfolden]

It can. You just have to see a little connection on something and go for it. See a girl wearing a t-shirt of your college, ask her if she went there. See someone with flawless tastes in their outfit, mention it. The smallest things from a ring to shoelaces can be the perfect ice breaker to get you in on a conversation with someone that you may not normally get to talk to.

- Matt

:thumbsup

Now I finally see why you're the "Love Hustler"

[gbs3769]

Now I finally see why you're the "Love Hustler"
You have no idea. ;)

- Matt

[Jessica41]

I really feel like the things that happen to me are a fucking joke. Like someone is making them happen because I can't comprehend how certain things can happen to coincide with others just to make for the perfect confusion.

[Jessica41]

anyway for cassie and anyone else who was wondering what rome looked like, here he is.

[gbs3769]

I really feel like the things that happen to me are a fucking joke. Like someone is making them happen because I can't comprehend how certain things can happen to coincide with others just to make for the perfect confusion.
I assume you have read The Divine Comedy.

- Matt

[Jessica41]

I assume you have read The Divine Comedy.

- Matt

nope... should I?

[gbs3769]

It's a good story about the trials of Dante as he travels through hell, purgatory and eventually paradise. Its essentially about the redemption of man. I'm not really sure why, but I just thought of it when I read your post.

- Matt

[whiteysax]

For a romantic twist on the Divine Comedy, might I suggest the movie "What Dreams May Come" starring Robin Williams. FANTASTIC movie and one of Robin's best serious roles ever! IMO, of course.

[il bacio dolce]

If I could offer one piece of advise that I have been following for some time now, it would be.... If you are going through hell, keep going!
That's excellent. I like that a lot.

:rolleyes Lately I'm a sucker for a motivational catch-phrase.

[il bacio dolce]

I really feel like the things that happen to me are a fucking joke. Like someone is making them happen because I can't comprehend how certain things can happen to coincide with others just to make for the perfect confusion.
I love that about life. It makes me laugh! :lol Speaking of motivational sayings: When there's nothing else you can do, laugh.

Rome is a cutie.

[dmbosw41]

has anyone tried online dating sites? If so, which ones?

[Jessica41]

Going out with Rome tonight.

[neumdogg]

Going out with Rome tonight.
The city?!

[whiteysax]

has anyone tried online dating sites? If so, which ones?
Most of them are a joke... I tried them several times... I've met one person I still talk to. Most girls on there are fairly superficial and looking for that "nice guy" that will "treat them right"... but their second question when you talk to them is "do you have a pic?" and as soon as they see it the conversation comes to a screeching hault unless your a well built, bronze skinned, pretty boy. I've given up on them... they're too expensive anyway.
BTW... the one's I've tried were Match.com, Yahoo, Cupidjunction.com. Facethejury.com is ok... even if you're just looking for friends... it's free and allows you to give out contact info for free. Most sites restrict that stuff unless you buy a membership.

[taphntm]

Rome is great, free bread for everyone. I wish I was Rome.

[saintjohnsriver]

has anyone tried online dating sites? If so, which ones?

they all suck to some degree

[dmbosw41]

yes I have tried Match and Yahoo...and your exactly right...not quality people on there at all. But I have been doing Eharmony and met a really nice girl last year that I almost asked to marry me but there were a few things that made the relationship sour so my search continues....

I think if you are a younger guy---nothing beats just getting out and meeting people the old fashioned way and I know sometimes that can be frustrating.

[taphntm]

Indeed it is frustrating. I think the problem for me is I don't want to waste time... Yet I sit here instead wasting time...

[gbs3769]

Going out with Rome tonight.
I can't wait to hear.

- Matt

[whiteysax]

yes I have tried Match and Yahoo...and your exactly right...not quality people on there at all. But I have been doing Eharmony and met a really nice girl last year that I almost asked to marry me but there were a few things that made the relationship sour so my search continues....

I think if you are a younger guy---nothing beats just getting out and meeting people the old fashioned way and I know sometimes that can be frustrating.
You used Eharmony?! They're ridiculously overpriced unless your in your mid thirties and are really having a hard time finding someone to settle down with. I'll be damned if at the age of 23 I'm gonna pay $60 a month for that stuff.

[ryguy178]

I've heard e-harmony is the best. But i'd never use a online dating site.

Jess hope all goes well..

[whiteysax]

I've heard e-harmony is the best. But i'd never use a online dating site.

Jess hope all goes well..
I agree Eharmony is at the top of the list... but it also costs way too much!!

[gbs3769]

"Hi, I'm Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of e-harmony.com. Dating services give you a picture and a profile... ...on 21 dimensions of compatibilty."

- Matt

[il bacio dolce]

Does it match you up with people similar to you, or opposite to you?

[karen2829]

I hate to admit this .. but I was on eharmony and from my participation in this thread you probably tell how it went for me.
I got a gift membership for 3 months and yeah I got lots of matches but none that ever went further than an initial request to communicate with me. The way it works is you get a match and if you are interested you approve them and go to step two which is to answer some ramdom questions. In total it takes about 5 steps to get to open communication and to be honest it's a big waste of time ( in my eyes anyways )
E-harmony is just like every other dating site but way more expensive.
I could almost kick myself in the ass for paying the renewal of usd 99.00 !!! I could of bought myself a new vibrator with that money HAHAHA Just Kidding.. !!

Has anyone tried one of those phone dating services ??

[gbs3769]

Well I think I am going to head to bed. Jess, you know I want a full report.

- Matt

[drmgrl]

I could almost kick myself in the ass for paying the renewal of usd 99.00 !!! I could of bought myself a new vibrator with that money HAHAHA Just Kidding.. !!


And that my dear is money well spent! ;)

[whiteysax]

I hate to admit this .. but I was on eharmony and from my participation in this thread you probably tell how it went for me.
I got a gift membership for 3 months and yeah I got lots of matches but none that ever went further than an initial request to communicate with me. The way it works is you get a match and if you are interested you approve them and go to step two which is to answer some ramdom questions. In total it takes about 5 steps to get to open communication and to be honest it's a big waste of time ( in my eyes anyways )
E-harmony is just like every other dating site but way more expensive.
I could almost kick myself in the ass for paying the renewal of usd 99.00 !!! I could of bought myself a new vibrator with that money HAHAHA Just Kidding.. !!

Has anyone tried one of those phone dating services ??

:eek:eek
I agree though... I find the $20 I spent for Yahoo Personals a waste. I think we should start a free service on Ants for blind dates... lol. No money - guaranteed common interest in music! Win win!:hump

[dmbosw41]

You used Eharmony?! They're ridiculously overpriced unless your in your mid thirties and are really having a hard time finding someone to settle down with. I'll be damned if at the age of 23 I'm gonna pay $60 a month for that stuff.


Well I am 29 and its worked great for me. At $50 for 3 months, thats like 17 bucks a month which is cheaper than Yahoo personals. Its much more fun and entertaining, safer and you find out a ton about what you are REALLY looking for. I get tons of matches anywhere from 21-32 which is my age range. I have met several of my matches. All were attractive woman that were not weird but I am really picky...so its taking me a while to find the one. Obviously all of you younger guys have plenty of dating to do and having fun before you are wanting to settle down.
But I am getting antsy to find a wife..not getting any younger...
I even met some woman who were DMB fans...With EH, you can screen them out, chat with them, study their profile and whatever without having to go through all the BS of rushing into a relationship that you meet at the bar or wherever.

[dmbosw41]

I hate to admit this .. but I was on eharmony and from my participation in this thread you probably tell how it went for me.
I got a gift membership for 3 months and yeah I got lots of matches but none that ever went further than an initial request to communicate with me. The way it works is you get a match and if you are interested you approve them and go to step two which is to answer some ramdom questions. In total it takes about 5 steps to get to open communication and to be honest it's a big waste of time ( in my eyes anyways )
E-harmony is just like every other dating site but way more expensive.
I could almost kick myself in the ass for paying the renewal of usd 99.00 !!! I could of bought myself a new vibrator with that money HAHAHA Just Kidding.. !!

Has anyone tried one of those phone dating services ??


I have been doing EH on and off since 2003. I almost got engaged to a wonderful woman that I dated for 6 months and the only reason I am not right now is cause of my choice to stay single a little longer. I let her slip away and now she is engaged to another guy. In the 11 years I have dated since HS...I have never had anything come that close. I just had cold feet but after that I realized even more what I am looking for, which is a needle in a haystack. I would rather spend a couple hundred dollars a year on a service that is comfortable, fun to use and will save me $1000 or more dollars a year on overall dating, spending money on woman that go nowhere, etc.

Everyone knows that people always look at the pictures and attraction is the biggest factor AND you have to be attracted to someone that you want to marry and most of the matches I get are attractive to my standards. But you have to be patient, communicate, take it slow, etc. I fricken sound like the EH spokesperson....:ugh I am not afraid to admit I use this service though! Although the commercials have to stop!:lol

[Jessica41]

Well I think I am going to head to bed. Jess, you know I want a full report.

- Matt

Well it was basically not TOO much different than any other time we went out...except for the fact that he is actively pursuing something this time around. It's been 2 months so I give him credit for putting up with my need for time. We went to the Valley where we always go, met up w/ friends, listened to dmb, played pool, talked, etc. Went home around 2am, talked in the car for 15 min or so...I basically went through my talk that I had the other day with a friend of mine, that I don't want to rush ANYTHING because whenever I did that in the past it always ended up in disaster. I'm going about this in a completely different way, and just letting whatever happens happen. He agreed that this was a good idea...I also told him I feel like at this age that it's more important to be more careful because basically we are kind of at the age where dating just for fun is losing it's appeal. for me anyway. When I was 18 if I found a guy I liked I would automatically date him (if I weren't in a 3 yr relationship), but you know what I mean. When you liked someone at that age, you just automatically went out. At this point, if I don't see the POTENTIAL for something long term with someone, I won't even waste my time. I'm thinking with my head this time. We'll see how that goes.

[ryguy178]

At this point, if I don't see the POTENTIAL for something long term with someone, I won't even waste my time. I'm thinking with my head this time. We'll see how that goes.

This has been my problem all my life. Forget about not doing this at 18 and doing it when you get older, I have been doing this since the age I learned that women didn't have cooties. :freak