View Full Version : Jon Corzine Molests Quadraplegic Orphans
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 02:12 PM
In this year's race for New Jersey Governor the ads that have been running on TV have been ridiculous in their mud-slinging.
What is being implied and in some instance flat out stated in these adds is that Jon Corzine is in cahoots with our corrupt, butt-slamming ex-Governor McGreevey and Doug Forrester is in cahoots with our big business cock slurping president.
My roommate and I have been having alot of fun with these adds thinking of terrible things to say about the candidates and doing them in the voice of the commericals' narrator. We have been cracking each other up. I was hoping in the spirit of mean-spirited politics if you guys care to join in our game.
For example:
"Doug Forrester was in favor of 9/11."
"Jon Corzine would slap your grandmother out of her wheelchair."
"Doug Forrester thinks Sinbad is funny."
"Jon Corzine keeps an 11-year old Korean boy in his basement for sex."
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 02:15 PM
Jon Corzine aborts women in back alleys, and then drinks their fetuses and wears their placenta as yamakas
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 02:16 PM
:lol
John Corzine doesn't wash his underwear.
Doug Forrester steals change from homeless people.
cbsauder
10-12-2005, 02:19 PM
Jon Corzine aborts women in back alleys, and then drinks their fetuses and wears their placenta as yamakas
:ugh man i'm glad i dont have to make a decision to vote or not to vote for this guy. :lol
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 02:22 PM
John Corzine has mud butt
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 02:24 PM
Doug Forrester thinks babies are stupid ... oh wait, no, that's me.
41ravens
10-12-2005, 02:28 PM
Jon Corzine would take Doug's mother, Dorothy Forrester, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again.
SideshowRob
10-12-2005, 02:31 PM
John Corzine doesnt wipe properly
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 02:32 PM
John Corzine would not vote for you
Jon Corzine sharts when spoken to.
Hudak-Budak
10-12-2005, 02:59 PM
Jon Corzine sharts when spoken to.
I was on the phone with the Ohio Department of Transportation when I read that and started laughing. Thanks. :lol
FACHEBLOOTZ
10-12-2005, 03:03 PM
Jon Corzine molests his family's pet
Doug Forester calls hoagies, grinders.....
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 03:14 PM
Jon Corzine combs his ass hair all the way up his back to cover his bald spot.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:15 PM
Doug Forrester once ate the Bible while water skiing
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 03:17 PM
Doug Forrester fucked your mother.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:18 PM
Jon Corzine date raped David Bowie
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:19 PM
Corzine hates Mexicans! And he is half Mexican! And he hates irony!
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 03:22 PM
John Corzine invented the question mark.
John Corzine coined the term "Pardon my French."
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 03:23 PM
Jon Corzine wears Jim McGreevey's ass as a hat.
FACHEBLOOTZ
10-12-2005, 03:23 PM
Some of these are good, I could keep this up all day.....
Doug Forester likes dry humping blind midgets.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:25 PM
Jon Corzine sired a baseball team.. an orchestra if you count the bastards
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 03:27 PM
John Corzine takes a penny but never leaves a penny.
Doug Forrester? And you thought McGreevey was gay?
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 03:30 PM
Doug Forrester picks all the chicken out of the chicken and broccoli at the Chinese buffet.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 03:31 PM
John Corzine shot a dead pit bull in the face
John Corzine shot a man in Reno just to watch him die
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:33 PM
Jon Corzine hates puppies
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:33 PM
Doug Forrester thought that OJ was not guilty
FACHEBLOOTZ
10-12-2005, 03:35 PM
John Corzine once slapped a baby in the face and pissed on the mom
Doug Forester was caught exposing himself in front of an old folks home.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:37 PM
Jon Corzine eats the last slice of pizza, everytime
Doug Forrester lies to Girl Scouts and tells them he already bought some cookies.
Jon Corzine thought Glen Ballard is the greatest producer of our time
Doug Forrester's favorite episode of Full House is when Stephanie gets pressured to smoke.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 03:42 PM
Jon Corzine pulled some strings and got Ashlee Simpson another appearance on SNL.
Doug Forrester was responsible for the cancellation of Family Guy.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 03:44 PM
Jon Corzine once attempted to use a young german girl as a sock puppet, and did not even have the courtesy to spit on her butthole.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 03:48 PM
Doug Forrester had two illagitamate babies with his sister and blamed it on the dog.
Jon Corzine punched a siamese twin in the necks just to watch their heads collide.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 03:50 PM
Doug Forrester thinks Hurricane Katrina "cleared out some of the riff-raff."
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 03:51 PM
Doug Forrester takes Cialis to the Prenatal Unit.
HolyCow
10-12-2005, 03:55 PM
Jon Corzine hopes your baby is born retarded.
Doug Forrester jacked off Pee Wee Herman.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 03:57 PM
Jon Corzine came in your nephew's hair and used it for conditioner.
41ravens
10-12-2005, 03:58 PM
Doug Forrester is a bad tipper.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 04:04 PM
John Corzine eats pieces of shit like you for breakfast
41ravens
10-12-2005, 04:06 PM
John Corzine has a copy of Machead and refuses to share it.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 04:09 PM
Jon Corzine raped Briana Forrester and spawned who is now the Duchess of Cornwall.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 04:17 PM
Jon Corzine laughs at jokes involving FDR's polio.
Doug Forrester once masturbated to Helen Keller.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 04:26 PM
Jon Corzine kidnaps the Canadian elderly and performs digital rectal examination on them while hooking his finger in the process.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 04:28 PM
Jon Corzine threatened to rip off a Little Leaguer's "Man Pleaser" and stick it into said Little Leaguer's "Cock Holster"
HolyCow
10-12-2005, 04:31 PM
Doug Forrester once lip-synched to Ashlee Simpson.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 04:33 PM
Doug Forrester pours water on little girls while they're sleep so he can "help them change."
HolyCow
10-12-2005, 04:36 PM
Jon Corzine and Doug Forrester made out together.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 04:41 PM
Jon Corzine is the one that fucked the monkey that started AIDS.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 04:43 PM
Jon Corzine created the feeling of something crawling down your ass crack.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 04:46 PM
Doug Forrester Dutch Oven's his wife.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 04:52 PM
Jon Corzine egged on Jayson Williams until he shot that limo driver.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 04:53 PM
Doug Forrester wants to loosen enviromental laws in NJ.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 05:12 PM
John Corzine's real name is Seth Rabinowitz
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 05:14 PM
John Corzine introduced Yoko Ono to John Lennon thus breaking up the Beatles
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 05:21 PM
Doug Forrester batted .143 in the ALDS and left 8 men on base in game 5.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 05:26 PM
Doug Forrester hid on Ashlee's bus on today's Dr. Phil and beat her with assorted medieval weaponry, including 2 feet of chain mail, before shooting her, proving Teresa's fears to be well-founded.
Ascf33
10-12-2005, 05:27 PM
John Corzine leaked the LWS and also has MacHead in a safe hidden in the wall behind a painting of Doug Forrester.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 05:36 PM
Doug Forrester started the great blizzard of 94
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 05:43 PM
"About a Boy" is a skewed potrayal of a relationship between Doug Forrester and an assortment of young boys that went missing in late 2001 and were later found disemboweled in the dense forest of Charlottesville. They're still looking for a second suspect.
Doug Forrester fucked your mother.
Your mother fucked Doug Forrester.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 05:46 PM
Doug Forrester sleeps 8 hours a night. Well, I guess he's pretty average when it comes to that
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 05:46 PM
John Corzine is El Chupacabra
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 05:48 PM
Corzine is semi responsible for the Armenian Genocide
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 05:54 PM
Jon Corzine is El Gordo from El Gordo y la Flaca.
Doug Forrester supported TuPac in the great Rap wars.
Jon Corzine hates the movie Scarface.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 06:01 PM
For 2 hours last Friday Doug Forrester single-handedly brought back the Romanov Dynasty.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 06:11 PM
Jon Corzine is the father of Whitney Houstan's fat daughter.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 06:13 PM
Doug Forrester BM'ed off the top of Sears tower.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:27 PM
Jon Corzine has been seen asking children to play Aladdin with him
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 06:31 PM
"Did I ever tell you about the time John Corzine took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Corzine takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Corzine yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'"
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:33 PM
I once saw Doug Forrester scissor kick Angela Landsbury
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:35 PM
Jon Corzine framed Roger Rabbit
The character of Johnny Appleseed was based on Corzine - except for the apple tree planting and not raping men
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 06:38 PM
John Corzine drank a full glass of liquid LSD with his eggs. Then he slept for 8 months straight. When he woke he rubbed his eyes and said, 'All in all, I prefer gin.
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 06:39 PM
Jon Corzine administers heroin to unwitting newborns.
Doug Forrester tips over elderly people's shopping carts.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 06:39 PM
John Corzine likes pepsi over coke, but perfers coke over crack.
watchtower86
10-12-2005, 06:40 PM
Jon Corzine wants to pee in your butt.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:41 PM
Jon Corzine enjoys going to at least 2 bris a month
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 06:41 PM
Doug Forrester believes genocide is a good thing.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 06:43 PM
Doug Forrester has a toenail on the end of his penis
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 06:45 PM
Jon Corzine's hair on his head is the consistency and texture of pubic hair.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:45 PM
Jon Corzine is pro-choice, as long as the choice is abortion, and he is allowed to eat the baby's heart after he pushes the mother down the steps.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:46 PM
Doug Forrester enjoys a good meal. A good meal to poop on and feed to young ghetto dwellers.
Jon Corzine has gone on the record as having a strange desire to masturbate with Al Roker's liposuction fat.
Mave Datthews
10-12-2005, 06:47 PM
:lol :lol :lol
Oh man... I can't be reading this thread during class... holy shit. :thumbsup
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 06:47 PM
Doug Forrester is pro-suicide.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 06:48 PM
John Corzine steals the nocturnal emissions of teenage boys
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:48 PM
Doug Forrester is part of the NOS mafia in Philly.
Jon Corzine sold Trey Anastasio his first 8 ball
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 06:50 PM
Doug Forrester kidnapped two Indian children and brought them into the United States. He made quick stop at the Brigham Young University psychology department (because he thought they were homosexual and had an independent streak that made it difficult for him to love them). After 7 days of electroshock and doping that would bring down a baby elephant came Dr. Sanjay Gupta and US Congressman/Louisiana Republican gubernatorial candidate Bobby Jindal.
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 06:52 PM
Doug Forrester has a fetish for field mice.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:53 PM
Jon Corzine has a bowl of green Excedrin on his desk. He once told his secretary that they were actually Ecstacy. When she didnt believe him, he fed her a loving handful of the Excedrin. He then proceeded to have sex with her in tnhe back of a volkswagen. That young girl grew up to be Julie Andrews.
Doug Forrester bought bunk molly and thought it was the awesome.
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 06:53 PM
Did I ever tell you about the time Corzine taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. Corzine said it would've happened sometime.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:54 PM
Corzine likes to float over field mice and bops them on the head.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:54 PM
Jon Corzine is a son of a bitch.
SideshowRob
10-12-2005, 06:55 PM
Doug Forrester listens to Norah Jones and touches himself...
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 06:57 PM
Jon Corzine was single handedly responsible for Fantasia Barrino winning American Idol.
Doug Forrester cheers for the Green Knight at Medieval Times
seekupdmb818
10-12-2005, 06:57 PM
Jon Corzine would take Doug's mother, Dorothy Forrester, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again.
Dorothy Forrester is a saint.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 07:01 PM
The Seed 2.0 by the Roots was actually written about Doug Forrester.
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 07:02 PM
Jon Corzine masterminded the assassination of John Lennon.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:03 PM
Doug Forrester actually killed lacy petterson.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:04 PM
horton actually saw Jon Corzine
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 07:06 PM
Jon Corzine masterminded the assassination of John Lennon.
by planting subliminal messages in The Catcher in the Rye
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:07 PM
Jon Corzine introduced the black eyed peas to each other.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:08 PM
Doug Forrester wrote the song "Mmm Bop".
Sonix Blastors
10-12-2005, 07:13 PM
John Corzine is impervious to sarcasm
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 07:25 PM
Doug Forrester closed this thread: http://www.antsmarching.org/forum/showthread.php?t=148351
Ascf33
10-12-2005, 07:32 PM
Doug Forrester closed this thread: http://www.antsmarching.org/forum/showthread.php?t=148351
John Corzine started this one :http://www.antsmarching.org/forum/showthread.php?t=117153&highlight=download+lost
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:34 PM
Doug Forrester origionally wrote Angel From Montgumery.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:38 PM
John Corzine thinks that the university of rutgers football team has a "fighting chance" every week in which it plays.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 07:57 PM
Jon Corzine hates Crumbo!
:eek:eek:eek:ugh
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 07:59 PM
Doug Forrester banned Freddy from these boards.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:13 PM
Jon Corzine is a puppy for my love.
Doug Forrester prefers KFC to Popeye's
Jon Corzine invented the avian flu
Doug Forrester enjoys fisting catholic school girls
Jon Corzine refused to donate during the Hurricane benefit concerts
Doug Forrester once handed out AIDS Cocktails and yelled Hi 5 everyone!
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:15 PM
Jon Corzine thinks that Arnold is the greastest govenor of all time.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:17 PM
Doug Forrester used to pick Dave up everyday when he was a baby, which later was used as insperation to Dave for an entire CD.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:21 PM
Jon Corzine's middle name is Tawatha
Doug Forrester is responsible for raising the price of the Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger at Wendy's
Jon Corzine almost stopped the crunchwrap from being invented.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:25 PM
Doug Forrester thinks the song Angel sucks... unless of course it is played with the lovely ladies guesting.
Jon Corzine always laughs at Jerry's Kids.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:27 PM
Doug Forrester unpasteurizes pasteurized milk
Jon Corzine enjoys watching women breast feed on the train.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:29 PM
Doug Forrester is that asshole that always leaves streak marks in the toilet when he comes to visit.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:30 PM
Jon Corzine asks if girls want tickets to the gun show
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:34 PM
Doug Forrester is that guy thats always naked at trys to talk to you in the locker room at your gym.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:37 PM
Jon Corzine is known to march around in his boxer shorts with his nuts hanging out, while smoking a fine cigar.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:38 PM
Doug Forrester traded Babe Ruth to the Yankees for a blowjob from Micky Mantle.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:41 PM
Jon Corzine has sex with pregnant women to "get that extra sucking effect"
Doug Forrester asks doctors to "Throw in a stitch for Daddy"
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:43 PM
Jon Corzine invented diarreha.
Doug Forrester is the reason that white men cant jump.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:44 PM
Jon Corzine supported the movement to ban Pete Rose from the Hall of Fame
Doug Forrester once bought a KFC family pack, and ate all the breast pieces, and left only thighs for everyone else.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:48 PM
Jon Corzine kidnapped the little black boy on Lost.
Doug Forrester actually picked the Braves to win the world series. :lorraine
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:49 PM
Jon Corzine enjoys Gallagher 2 more then Gallagher 1
Doug Forrester enjoys Gallagher 1
Doug Forrester deliberately "cups" his farts with his hands and then releases them under the noses of unsuspecting women and children.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:52 PM
Jon Corzine gave women the idea that guys should put the toilet seat down after they use the toilet.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:52 PM
Jon Corzine smelt it
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 08:53 PM
Doug Forrester dealt it though.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 08:57 PM
Jon Corzine prefers to sleep in the nude, and upon getting morning wood he enjoys slapping his penis against the breakfast table yelling "BRING ME MY SCONES!"
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 09:06 PM
:lol :lol :lol
I must say I am thrilled with how this thread turned out. My roommate and I spent a good deal of time making these up the other night and I was hoping we weren't going insane.
I'm glad to see some other people got into the spirit.
By the way, Doug Forrester wrestles midgets in cole slaw on Saturdays nights for dimes.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 09:11 PM
:lol :lol :lol
I must say I am thrilled with how this thread turned out. My roommate and I spent a good deal of time making these up the other night and I was hoping we weren't going insane.
I'm glad to see some other people got into the spirit.
By the way, Doug Forrester wrestles midgets in cole slaw on Saturdays nights for dimes.
you should print this thread out and sent it to both of them... i wonder what they would say when they saw that...
in other news...
Doug Forrester always eats the last bagel bite.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:11 PM
AP reports: Jon Corzine's realname is Jugg Twitty.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 09:14 PM
Hmmm......I do know a guy that knows Corzine.....
Nah...
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:15 PM
Doug Forrester says that the other white meat we've been searching for all this time, is actually his penis. yes, his penis.
~United Press International
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 09:23 PM
Jon Corzine really whips the llamas ass.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:24 PM
Jon Corzine prefers to sleep in the nude, and upon getting morning wood he enjoys slapping his penis against the breakfast table yelling "BRING ME MY SCONES!"
:lol:lol:lol:thumbsup
EDIT:
:hump= Jon Corzine
:ggoat= unsuspecting goat
:ggoat:hump
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:27 PM
Doug Forrester lost in a fight against Aquaman
Jon Corzine thinks that Michael Kang is the most talented musician of our time.
Doug Forrester still sends out chia pets for christmas gifts.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:28 PM
They both went to that jason mraz show in New Jersey.
:lorraine:lorraine:twak:twak
:vomit
this is one of the greatest threads ever.
Jon Corizine opposes brain and eye development in infants.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:33 PM
Jon Corzine's favorite song ever is Fool to Think.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 09:34 PM
Doug Forrester still has a pet rock.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:34 PM
Jon Corzine doesn't know who "Jake" is.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:36 PM
Doug Forrester still has a pet rock.
Doug Forrester feeds his pet rock.
Doug Forrester gives pet rocks as gifts.
Doug Forrester had his pet rock neutered.
Doug Forrester touches his pet rock and says "red rocket".
Doug Forrester tried to mate his pet (cat) rock with his pet (dog) rock.
Doug Forrester doesn't consider it cheating if he puts peanut butter on his balls and lets his pet rock lick it off.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:37 PM
Jon Corzine insists that everyone would be better if they would cover "Crazy Game of Poker" by O.A.R.
Doug Forrester stole the cookie from the cookie jar, denied it, and then blamed it on someone else.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:38 PM
Jon Corzine drinks ginger beer.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:40 PM
Jon Corzine enjoys tofurkey.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:42 PM
Jon Corzine eats that bacon stuff that isn't truly bacon at all.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:42 PM
Doug Forrester told Butch he'd look cool with a goatee.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:43 PM
Jon Corzine contends that he has eaten a stale Twinkie
Doug Forrester hands out pennies on Halloween.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:44 PM
Doug Forrester's foreskin is used as a tarp at Yankees Stadium
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:45 PM
Doug Forrester is that guy who you can see watching TV when you knock on his door on Halloween, but tries to turn down the lights and pretend like he isnt home even though you already know he is home and watching TV, but is just to cheap to buy a bag of candy for little paraplegic boys who have no bladder control.
Jon Corzine rubbed udder cream over his man boobs. (http://www.buzzle.com/showImage.asp?image=290)
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:46 PM
Jon Corzine rubbed udder cream over his man boobs. (http://www.buzzle.com/showImage.asp?image=290)
and asked Doug Forrester to lick it off.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 09:47 PM
and asked Doug Forrester to lick it off.
And Doug did it.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:48 PM
And Doug did it.
But not before making his cambodian boy slave taste it first.
Doug Forrester is actually Jon Corzine.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 09:52 PM
Jon Corzine doesn't know who "Jake" is.
:lol This one kills me.
I also like the one about peanut butter on the balls. I'm dying over here.
Jon Corzine cut Drazen Petrovic's brakes.
Doug Forrester stencils pictures of the Virgin Mary on corn chips.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 09:53 PM
Jon Corzine thought that Sam Bowie was going to be better then Michael Jordan
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:54 PM
Jon Corzine gunned down tupac.
Doug Forrester asked Jon Corzine for a reach around.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 09:58 PM
Doug Forrester asked Jon Corzine for a reach around.
Jon Corzine said no.
Jon Corzine rubbed udder cream over his man boobs. (http://www.buzzle.com/showImage.asp?image=290)
I think alpha could use this.
* Sailors use it after tugging on sails and ropes to soothe callused and sunburned skin.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:07 PM
Jon Corzine is the old guy in the six flags commercials.
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 10:09 PM
:lol I thought this thread would suck, but it turned out to be consistently funny. :thumbsup to everyone!
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:13 PM
:lol I thought this thread would suck, but it turned out to be consistently funny. :thumbsup to everyone!
I bought black foliage today, it better be good or else i'm kicking your ass.
Jon Corzine supports Cancer.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:15 PM
Jon Corzine took to the streets in celebration after the earthquake in Pakistan.
Doug Forrester thinks Peter Jennings "had it coming".
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:17 PM
Jon Corzine's dad was an astronaut
Doug Forrester's dad could beat up Jon Corzine's dad.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:19 PM
Doug Forrester claims that Iselin, NJ smells like "New Delhi in August".
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:21 PM
Jon Corzine agrees with Doug Forrester on that topic.
in a side note, holy fuck that whole area is like that, Iselin, Avenel. But hey, the food is good.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:22 PM
Doug Forrester supports Harriet Miers.
Doug Forrester giggles when he shits.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:23 PM
Jon Corzine is for drinking and driving.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 10:25 PM
Doug Forrester has smelly dog farts.
rhymeandreazon
10-12-2005, 10:26 PM
Doug Forrester drove the bus that dumped shit on people in Chicago
John Corzine killed Tupac and Biggie and Nicole Simpson
Doug Forrester hates black people just like George Bush
John Corzine started the rumor that the NYC subways were going to be bombed
nonewdirections
10-12-2005, 10:26 PM
I bought black foliage today, it better be good or else i'm kicking your ass.
:D that is fucking awesome! Don't listen on shitty speakers. Do listen on headphones. Don't listen out of order. Do sit down for 70 mins with the lights off and enjoy.
By the way, Jon Corzine has a contract out for the lives of the members of the Olivia Tremor Control.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:26 PM
Doug Forrester shot the sheriff.
rhymeandreazon
10-12-2005, 10:27 PM
Doug Forrester shot the sheriff.
but hey he didnt kill the deputy
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:28 PM
but hey he didnt kill the deputy
yeah but that bastard John Corzine did...
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:30 PM
Jon Corzine copies Jay Mohr's imitation of Christopher Walken.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:32 PM
Doug Forrester shaves his balls, but then the hair grows back in. Then when the weather gets cold, and the new grown baby hair on his balls sticks up, he spends hours at a time rubbing his balls. He then sniffs his hand, and exclaims "Powdery!" or "Asparagus" depending on the time of day.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:33 PM
Jon Corzine copies Jay Mohr's imitation of Christopher Walken.
and doug forrester copies jon corzine's imitaion of jay mohr's imitaion of christopher walken...
fleckhead
10-12-2005, 10:33 PM
John Corzine has the only copy of Machead and refuses to release it to the public.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 10:34 PM
Doug Forrester ejaculates bleach.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:35 PM
Secretly I am counting how many times each candidate is mentioned and I am going to vote for the guy mentioned least.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:37 PM
Doug Forrester wants to make smiling illegal.
Jon Corzine thinks Robinson Cano was in the baseline.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 10:37 PM
Doug Forrester enjoys neutering baby kittens, blindfolded, after "a few rounds with the boys".
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:37 PM
Jon Corzine's gardener gets paid by jelly beans. Jelly beans filled with AIDS!
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:38 PM
Jon Corzine prefers to be called Big Papi
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 10:38 PM
Jon Corzine makes my bathwater cold.
Jon Corzine urinates in the shower.
Jon Corzine has urinated in a public sink... 83 times.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:40 PM
Jon Corzine invades other threads.
Jon Corzine went in for pectoral implants and left with boobs. (http://www.ebreastaug.com/zip/NY/white-plains/60/60-implants-before-after/pic/implants-before-after-09.jpg)
**If you are offended by boobie pictures then don't click the link**
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 10:41 PM
Doug Forrester invented pedophilia.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:42 PM
Jon Corzine is offended by boobs. Take that as you may
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 10:42 PM
Doug Forrester smacked Jorge Garcia upside the head when he was a kid, throwing off his metabolism.
Doug Forrester slaps 6-year-old girls when adults don't laugh at Carlos Mencia.
Jon Corzine makes the sound bites of Vincent D'Onofrio for the Law and Order commericials.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:42 PM
Doug Forrester invented pedophilia.
Jon Corzine made pedophilia an art form.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 10:43 PM
Jon Corzine got Jiminy Glick canceled.
fleckhead
10-12-2005, 10:44 PM
john corzine drives a Kia with spinners on it.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 10:44 PM
Doug Forrester tries to perform oral sex on himself, but can't, so just sucks on the foreskin.
Jon Corzine broke his neck while performing autofellatio.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:47 PM
Jon Corzine bought millions of sick children medicine.
then he peeled back the label and revealed it was rat poison.
saintjohnsriver
10-12-2005, 10:48 PM
John Corzine was responsible for Everyday.
John Corzine fired Steve Lillywhite.
brendangen412
10-12-2005, 10:48 PM
Jon Corzine killed J.R.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:50 PM
Jon Corzine and Doug Forrester both decided not to run any commercial tonight so I can't laugh at them.
saintjohnsriver
10-12-2005, 10:50 PM
Jon Corzine is the real killer and oj can prove it.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:51 PM
Doug Forrester started the dead baby jokes.
Doug Forrester actually suck the titanic.
bubba40
10-12-2005, 10:51 PM
*cough* sticky *cough*
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 10:52 PM
Doug Forrester has a lucky puppy's foot on his keychain.
Doug Forrester supported Jon Corzine's right to die while recovering from his broken neck.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 10:53 PM
Jon Corzine used to suck dick for coke.
I SEEN HIM!
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:54 PM
Doug Forrester started the "do you like seafood" joke.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 10:55 PM
Jon Corzine used to suck dick for coke.
I SEEN HIM!
Doug Forrester thinks that half baked is one of the worst comedys in recent memory.
bubba40
10-12-2005, 11:01 PM
Instead of peanut brittle, Jon Corzine makes poop brittle, and sells it door-to-door during the holiday season.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 11:02 PM
Doug Forrester was the umpire in the White Sox v Angels game tonight.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 11:02 PM
Doug Forrester taught his dog to sound racial slurs.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 11:03 PM
John Corzine barks at black people.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 11:05 PM
Jon Corzine gave Gumby oral sex while he was sleep.
alphatabs
10-12-2005, 11:06 PM
Doug Forrester watched while masturbating in the corner.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 11:06 PM
Doug Forrester pays for things using pennys.
FunkyTeaParty
10-12-2005, 11:07 PM
Jon Corzine bought Osama Bin Laden a dialysis machine with government money.
RustyShackelfrd
10-12-2005, 11:07 PM
Jon Corzine blew off his grandmother's birthday because he was stoned. She understood.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 11:08 PM
Doug Forrester is Hitler's grandson.
|UAY| |)(V)|3
10-12-2005, 11:42 PM
This thread died while i was in the bath because both Doug Forrester and Jon Corzine came to my house to watch me bathe while circle jerking each other.
skywalker_009
10-12-2005, 11:44 PM
well know one was playing with me and i felt dumb doing it by myself...
tell me doug forrester couldnt come up with a few dirty jokes about that sentence...
Disco Stu
10-12-2005, 11:55 PM
Corzine hates Mexicans! And he is half Mexican! And he hates irony!
hahaha
Jon Corzine likes Michael Moore
Doug Forrester thinks two blinks means yes
reverend miles
10-13-2005, 12:03 AM
john corzine likes to scratch his balls and smell his fingers
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 12:07 AM
Doug Forrester masturbates to White Oleander, at the part where Astrid is partially topless.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 12:16 AM
When Jon Corzine was 13 he experimented with anal sex by holding is cheeks open and slowly descending on a plunger handle.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 12:24 AM
Doug Forrester is jewish... thats right... he killed jesus.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 12:31 AM
Doug Forrester made Katrina look like a fetus.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 12:36 AM
John Corzine is all up in the coolaid and dont even know the flavor.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 12:39 AM
Jon Corzine partnered with Teresa Heinz-Kerry and invented the Heinz ketchup-flavored potato chips. That shit is disgusting. I nearly vomited when I ate some.
saintjohnsriver
10-13-2005, 12:39 AM
john corzine is jason mraz's biggest fan:eek
saintjohnsriver
10-13-2005, 12:41 AM
john corzine made a cameo during Paris Hilton's porn tape.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 12:52 AM
doug forrester was really the one that sold out to the agents in the matrix
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 12:56 AM
Doug Forrester knows what's not happening (http://www.doug.com/PhotoGallery/Photos/LRG/HPIM0297.jpg)tonight. Bastard stole the show and the women. Then again....
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 12:59 AM
Jon Corzine is what Willis is talking about.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:05 AM
Doug Forrester collects his smegma in a small vile and sniffs it.
alphatabs
10-13-2005, 01:06 AM
Jon Corzine sprinkles wood shavings on his ballsack and makes his pet woodpecker go to work down there.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:09 AM
Jon Corzine gives 6-year-olds priapism.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:10 AM
Jon Corzine likes goldfish, but not because they are so delicious, however he likes goldfish because he likes to give them to little boys... and then rape them... in the ass.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:13 AM
Jon Corzine strives to resemble Dennis Rader. Hey, that could actually work. Find some shitty vague reason to put DR in an ad, quickly show some other picture, then show Jon Corzine.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:15 AM
Doug Forrester went in for his colonoscopy without drinking all the liquid stuff and gave the doctor a little suprise.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:29 AM
Doug Forrester went in for his colonoscopy without drinking all the liquid stuff and gave the doctor a little suprise. The doctor will be fine, as long as Jon Corvine is there to consume it all.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:30 AM
Doug Forrester makes bad first impressions.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:32 AM
Doug Forrester stole my "Thirteen" dvd. I love Holly Hunter as much as the next man, but c'mon...
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:34 AM
Jon Corvine is that kid who used to eat glue back in kindergarden.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:40 AM
In 1996 Doug Forrester shot and killed Jack Cafferty. Now we're just waiting...
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:45 AM
Jon Corvine claims to be an optimist, but fills his glass to where it is half empty.
RustyShackelfrd
10-13-2005, 01:58 AM
Doug Forrester gave head to a dead field mouse on top of a Spanish hooker while being chased by federal agents running to the pace of Jeff Buckley's New Year's Prayer.
skywalker_009
10-13-2005, 01:59 AM
Jon Corvine breeds gerbals to be used for gerbal racing.
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