DMB Fans Sentiment Towards Homosexuality

[FireItUp]

Originally Posted by jets42689

lol @ the first top comment

Oh shit, I lol'd.

[hailtopitt]

Originally Posted by jets42689

lol @ the first top comment

which one?

[rqstnnlitnmnt]

Originally Posted by jets42689

So, I am wondering how the DMB community feels about homosexuality/how many gay DMB fans there are out there...

I feel overrall that it isnt the most accepting venue, similarly to sports. There is def. plenty of homophobia spewed on these boards. I myself just came out like a year ago, and it drew shock and surprise from all my friends and family. I'm not your typical gay kid, I love sports, DMB, drinking and all that good stuff.

Sometimes it can be overwhelming how far removed I feel that I am from the gay community. Am I the only gay DMB fan out there?
Anyway... yah, post your thoughts!

There are plenty of us out there. I'll see those comments pop up sometimes and throw a sharp "fuck you" at my screen, but then I'll start wondering how it's possible for those few to identify with a band whose music is all about brotherhood and living for the day and at the same time hold on to so much hate. Just gotta feel bad for them and move on - hopefully they'll come around one day, but the sad truth is they're probably too scared to ever do the work it takes to realize how shitty they are.

Keep your head up brother. Most of the time there's no point in wondering why people are the way they are. One thing life's taught me is that people will always try to throw negativity at you, but you just gotta do what you do and keep on keepin' on.

[dmbetc]

I'm gay and have never had any issues on this board or while at shows. I always see a handful of gay/lesbians at shows and I have never seen anyone being hasseled. I believe this is be a very accecpting community. I know a handful of "hardcore" fans on this site that are regular posters.

You just have to get that stigma out of your head otherwise you will precieve everyone's actions as homophobic even if they aren't. There are far less haters out there than those who accecpt and embrace the gay community. 99% of the homophobic things said on here are jokes and are not meant to be malice.

So, relax and don't worry or look for negativty and you'll see what an accepting community dmb fans truly are.

[drop2d]

I knew there was another thread about this around here... warehouseguy started it with a great article.

http://antsmarching.org/forum/showthread.php?t=285676

[420th jimi]

I have to say I am impressed with how this thread has gone so far. Hope the positive responses keep coming.

[bbqguy1962]

I'm pretty certain that a person's sexuality is going to be a non issue to most DMB fans. Having said that, we're not likely to see many negative posts simply because of the stigma that would come with it. At the Toronto show I was in the row behind a revolving group of gays and lesbians, the only part that bothered me was that I didn't need to watch any mixture of people make out/grope each other while I was trying to watch the show.

As for homophobic slurs on the boards or in athletics - check out "You Can Play Project"

[Flip36]

I still find it odd that people out there are shocked when somebody says they are gay, even if they have known them for a long time.. who cares? accept it and move on!

[SpotlightEyes]

Originally Posted by Flip36

I still find it odd that people out there are shocked when somebody says they are gay, even if they have known them for a long time.. who cares? accept it and move on!

pretty much.

I get really irritated and forever change my opinion of people when I find ou that they're in any way judgmental of someone for such insignificant reason.

[Kevaroo]

Originally Posted by 420th jimi

I have to say I am impressed with how this thread has gone so far. Hope the positive responses keep coming.

Things are on the up and up around here If anyone ever feels like there is a comment posted anywhere about being disrespectful please let me know.

[beiler]

Dave may occasionally impersonate what seems like a gay man's voice , but I think he does it with no ill will as I believe this band believes the same thing I do: Namely, if you have a problem with gay marriage, do not marry a gay person. Otherwise... get a life. And if you are heterosexual against equality for all humans, learn to be tolerant of others no matter what your religious beliefs are because this country always moves towards expanding civil rights and it is only a matter of time before the Federal Government puts an end to the bigotry towards gays and grants them equal civil rights as the US Constitution requires. This recent attempt by Republicans to supress and not expand civil rights is not only failing, but causing great harm to the party, and that is why it is only a matter of time before this issue is a non-issue.

[FireItUp]

Originally Posted by dmbetc

I'm gay and have never had any issues on this board or while at shows. I always see a handful of gay/lesbians at shows and I have never seen anyone being hasseled. I believe this is be a very accecpting community. I know a handful of "hardcore" fans on this site that are regular posters.

You just have to get that stigma out of your head otherwise you will precieve everyone's actions as homophobic even if they aren't. There are far less haters out there than those who accecpt and embrace the gay community. 99% of the homophobic things said on here are jokes and are not meant to be malice.

So, relax and don't worry or look for negativty and you'll see what an accepting community dmb fans truly are.

This couldn't have been said better.

[TrippinNancies1]

Originally Posted by rqstnnlitnmnt

There are plenty of us out there. I'll see those comments pop up sometimes and throw a sharp "fuck you" at my screen, but then I'll start wondering how it's possible for those few to identify with a band whose music is all about brotherhood and living for the day and at the same time hold on to so much hate. Just gotta feel bad for them and move on - hopefully they'll come around one day, but the sad truth is they're probably too scared to ever do the work it takes to realize how shitty they are.

Keep your head up brother. Most of the time there's no point in wondering why people are the way they are. One thing life's taught me is that people will always try to throw negativity at you, but you just gotta do what you do and keep on keepin' on.

Love this post, well said

[TheLastPig]

I'm sure the DMB community is accepting about this issue. I personally have never had any issue and never understood why anyone would.

[dreamingrace]

Originally Posted by water into wine

Well regardless of what band someone follows or what they enjoy or what ideals and morals they claim to follow, there will still be those with ignorant points of view who feel threatened by something as insignificant as whether another chooses to like men or women. I can only hope that through the lyircs of Dave and the band, that DMB fans have gained greater sense of compassion and understanding for one another, regardless of differences.

You opened a big can of worms. That's not to say you shouldn't have gone there, because it's reality. The only way to further peoples level of acceptance is to be able to engage in meaningful discussion.

well put.

[dreamingrace]

Originally Posted by 420th jimi

I have to say I am impressed with how this thread has gone so far. Hope the positive responses keep coming.

I completely agree adam.

[SpotlightEyes]

Originally Posted by beiler

because this country always moves towards expanding civil rights and it is only a matter of time before the Federal Government puts an end to the bigotry towards gays and grants them equal civil rights as the US Constitution requires. This recent attempt by Republicans to supress and not expand civil rights is not only failing, but causing great harm to the party, and that is why it is only a matter of time before this issue is a non-issue.

I don't think you really understand what you're seeing play out on television.

More people should study theatre, play acting, screen writing, if they're to better understand what they see on televised news.

The Federal Government has no real interest in civil rights, equality, or equal rights as the Constitution requires. This only comes in to the spotlight, or "headline" when it's needed...needed to distract away from something else.

Our government loves when we squabble over something like gay marriage...which shouldn't even be a QUESTION to begin with. While we squabble over this, they get away with murder and thievery. Great trade for them.

[rantingthespian]

Well, I am bi-sexual.

[slygrooves2dmb2]

As the old saying goes, "We are everywhere!" Even DMB shows. I've been out longer than some of you have been alive and I have dealt with my share of homophobia and straight up ignorance on the subject.
I've been going to DMB shows since 1999 and have only had one bad encounter because of me being a lesbian. Some frat boy d-bag got mad because I was dancing during Two Step. He kept calling me Dude and jumping in front of me and was just being an all around dick.
Finally I turned around and said, "Look, I'm not a dude. Could you leave me alone and let me enjoy the show please?" Then I lit up a cigarette to calm me down a little and the guy had the nerve to ask, "Hey DUDE, can I have one of those?" I just turned and glared at him and went right back to dancing.
I was trying hard to ignore the comments he was making about how I looked like a guy with my shaved head but then he took it one step too far. He shoved me in the back and called me a fucking dyke and next thing I knew my 3/4 full beer was in his crotch. He acted like he was going to swing at me then his friends grabbed him, my friend grabbed me and turned me back to the stage where the boys were just starting into the jam. I went right back to dancing.
I heard him say to his friend something about how he couldn't believe that bitch threw her beer on me. Then his friend yelled at him, "You pushed her and called her a dyke! You're lucky all you got was a beer to the crotch. You totally deserved it now stop being a dick."
After the song ended, my friend and I went to get another beer and a new spot on the lawn. Later while getting another beer, I saw Mr. D-Bag in cuffs being led out by the police. I smiled and waved at him.
So one incident in 13 years of shows is a pretty good statement of how the DMB community feels about gay people. They generally just don't care as long as you're kind.

[beiler]

Originally Posted by SpotlightEyes

I don't think you really understand what you're seeing play out on television.

More people should study theatre, play acting, screen writing, if they're to better understand what they see on televised news.

The Federal Government has no real interest in civil rights, equality, or equal rights as the Constitution requires. This only comes in to the spotlight, or "headline" when it's needed...needed to distract away from something else.

Our government loves when we squabble over something like gay marriage...which shouldn't even be a QUESTION to begin with. While we squabble over this, they get away with murder and thievery. Great trade for them.

I agree with everything you just said except the part about me not "understand[ing]" what I am seeing play out on tv. The Federal Government, when not over run by the GOP or Tea Party extremists, will always have an interest in civil rights, equality and equal rights under the Constitution. It is both parties, but mainly the Republican Obama hatefest Romney machine lately, picking issues ranging from abortion to immigration (to Pot) to rile up the conservative, evangelical political base. Unfortunately, the country has evolved, and issues like abortion (which was addressed through the 5th Amendments Right to Privacy in Roe v. Wade some 40 years ago) are no longer wedge issues. Put differently, does anyone ever wonder why Republicans are so against Gay Marriage and other similar issues yet they never do anything about it even when they have political majorities? My answer is that they must do nothing or they cannot complain about it and put in on the platform of their next election.

I have never gotten political on this site (and am careful to avoid on facebook, etc)... but I am pretty confident I understand the political landscape and the gamesmanship and strategic disingenuity that has infected our Congress's ability to pass legislation for the people, by the people, of the people, etc...

Carter for President in 2016!!!

[rantingthespian]

I just wish it didn't matter to people what you are. Personally, I never really aligned myself to what people would call the "gay community", because I don't want to be part of a group. I just want to be myself. The more lines we draw in the sand, the more fights we will cause. We need to erase all the lines.

It shouldn't matter if you are gay, straight, bi, transgender, asexual, woman, man, black, white, brown, Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Wiccan, Hindu, Buddhist, rich, poor, liberal, conservative, American, Canadian, Korean, Chinese, Native Americans, right handed, left handed, if you like Coke over Pepsi, or Pepsi over Coke, or if you prefer Dr. Pepper, etc.

It should be that what defines you is not what you are, but who you are.

[SquishyCircuit]

We are everywhere..

[chach1369]

Being an admitted mo myself, I've gotta say people at the shows don't give a shit what you're into sexually. Unless you make someone miss taking a drink during power hour by talking about felching or some disgusting shit like that. Anyway, point I'm trying to reach here: When you are at a DMB show, you are there (we ALL are there) as a DMB fan. Not a gay DMB fan, not a black DMB fan, you're just a fan. All my DMB friends know I've been out for about five years, and it's great, cuz you can motorboat all the big-titted women at the shows, and they're fine with it, and their boyfriends are fine with it (if you say, it's okay, I'm gay). I think a lot of just every day word usage is interpreted as homophobia. Personally, I love to use words like faggot, homo, gay, queer, cockgobbler, etc. It's just the way the words have evolved. Offense is taken not given, so remember what used to be taught, about that whole sticks & stones nonsense, back in the good old days when everything could just roll off our shoulders. But if people ARE offended by words like that, you should call them a fag cuz they're totally acting like Nancies. You'll notice a lot more of the "fag talk" coming from the college age guys. These are probably the ones that get drunk and fuck around with their roommate back in their dorm, so they have to put on a big show acting like a manly man.

Just remember this: Being gay isn't like being white. People can't just look at you and tell you're gay (unless you're Clay Aiken), so the only people at the show that will know you're gay are the ones you tell. But most of us won't give a shit anyway.

[chach1369]

Originally Posted by berman1125

There are a ton of gay/lesbians at dmb shows...I think for the most part this is a very accepting fan base, the boards are a whole different monster.

You can find all the lesbians by the fish taco stands.

[chach1369]

Originally Posted by jets42689

Thanks guys... it wasnt/isnt easy but its all good... its def all about the love... im sure there are plenty of gay casual DMB fans... any die hards??? hmm

This guy right here. 47 shows so far.

[blusi]

What's the deal with the gay people? As long as they aren't drunk at a DMB show and not talking all the time or giving a shit about the show, they are real DMB fans.

[blusi]

Originally Posted by chach1369

Being an admitted mo myself, I've gotta say people at the shows don't give a shit what you're into sexually. Unless you make someone miss taking a drink during power hour by talking about felching or some disgusting shit like that. Anyway, point I'm trying to reach here: When you are at a DMB show, you are there (we ALL are there) as a DMB fan. Not a gay DMB fan, not a black DMB fan, you're just a fan. All my DMB friends know I've been out for about five years, and it's great, cuz you can motorboat all the big-titted women at the shows, and they're fine with it, and their boyfriends are fine with it (if you say, it's okay, I'm gay). I think a lot of just every day word usage is interpreted as homophobia. Personally, I love to use words like faggot, homo, gay, queer, cockgobbler, etc. It's just the way the words have evolved. Offense is taken not given, so remember what used to be taught, about that whole sticks & stones nonsense, back in the good old days when everything could just roll off our shoulders. But if people ARE offended by words like that, you should call them a fag cuz they're totally acting like Nancies. You'll notice a lot more of the "fag talk" coming from the college age guys. These are probably the ones that get drunk and fuck around with their roommate back in their dorm, so they have to put on a big show acting like a manly man.

Just remember this: Being gay isn't like being white. People can't just look at you and tell you're gay (unless you're Clay Aiken), so the only people at the show that will know you're gay are the ones you tell. But most of us won't give a shit anyway.

Well said my friend.

[TwoStep2888]

Kill All Gays


*hurls self out of thread*

[chach1369]

Originally Posted by TwoStep2888

Kill All Gays


*hurls self out of thread*

Bah ha ha ha ha ha!!!

[JRSHarney]

Originally Posted by jets42689

So, I am wondering how the DMB community feels about homosexuality/how many gay DMB fans there are out there...

I feel overrall that it isnt the most accepting venue, similarly to sports. There is def. plenty of homophobia spewed on these boards. I myself just came out like a year ago, and it drew shock and surprise from all my friends and family. I'm not your typical gay kid, I love sports, DMB, drinking and all that good stuff.

Sometimes it can be overwhelming how far removed I feel that I am from the gay community. Am I the only gay DMB fan out there?

Anyway... yah, post your thoughts!

How I feel about gay people has nothing whatsoever to do with being a fan of Dave Matthews Band or a fan of anything for that matter. I am accepting of others lifestyle choices. To each their own.