what if your child was gay?

[NextMovement41]

How did I know jeepkid would say some stupid shit ITT?

[MOWJO8185]

I wouldn't care from the perspective of having an issue with their sexuality. I do think it would be harder. I know the world is more tolerant now, but I'm sure there's a large population that can be pretty brutal still. I have a very sensitive 2 year old girl, who came to me crying when her cousin grabbed a toy from her, and just THAT broke my heart. I can barely fathom the pain in my heart for a gay child to hear some things they will undoubtedly hear. From that perspective, I probably have a slight preference that my child be straight, in the sense of wanting to protect them. But if my child was gay, I would so my best to make sure they feel secure and confident about who they are.

[jojo04]

My fiancé and I have already talked about this. She just randomly asked me if I would be ok if we had a son and he was gay. I think I said that if the worse thing my future son did was suck a couple dicks I'd be fine. I just wouldn't want him whoring it up

[barbogast]

Originally Posted by jojo04

My fiancé and I have already talked about this. She just randomly asked me if I would be ok if we had a son and he was gay. I think I said that if the worse thing my future son did was suck a couple dicks I'd be fine. I just wouldn't want him whoring it up

Would you be ok with him whoring it up if he were straight?

[AJF_41]

Originally Posted by Rebecca De Mornay

don't care about gay vs. straight as long as he's good at sports so I can live my unfulfilled dreams vicariously through him.

[Bearclaw_]

Originally Posted by dontdrink36

There are literally millions of people who care. That's why being gay is more difficult than being straight.

I understand that but it was more a phrase than an actual question--as in it is my viewpoint. My child is gay? Awesome. Not an issue at all.

As far as people generalizing others here:
a) People that won't ever accept gays DEVIL WORK!
b) people (me) that realize it's a non issue and go about life without a thought of it.

[defcon]

IF male, and catcher, we'd have to have a talk. Otherwise I'm cool with the gayness. Its 2014. At least I wouldn't have to worry about him/her accidentally having a child too early in life, which ends their own.

[aicdmb]

Originally Posted by JRS1386

As long as it's not a ginger I'm good

Originally Posted by neumdogg

I wouldn't care at all. Just want him/her to be successful and happy.

Neums pretty much sums up my opinion..
If it was my only kid, and it meant not having grandchildren, I'd be a little disappointed, but I'd get over it real quick

[mr.MikeD]

So to paraphrase some of these replies: "I'd be fine with it as long as they dont look gay, act gay, bring gay people around, or do gay stuff".

[dmbetc]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

I would prefer if my child was not homosexual. I consider myself pretty tolerant, I don't give two shits if gay people get married and have their own life, I actually think it's wonderful. But actually physically being in the presence of a gay couple does make me slightly uncomfortable.

There's a guy in my extended group of friends who happens to be gay. Big burley guy, great person, down to earth, etc. I don't mind when he comes around at all, but when his boyfriend shows up it's a whole different ballgame. This dude is SO gay. Just the other night, they showed up, and when my friend went to the bathroom, his boyfriend starts waxing poetic on how he can't wait to suck his dick when he gets home. I think it's inappropriate to discuss that kind of stuff to begin with, but just hearing those words come from a guy's mouth made me cringe. They also sometimes aggressively make-out in front of our group of friends as if to say "look at us! we're gay!", which makes me incredibly uncomfortable.

So in other words, I guess I wouldn't really care if my son was gay as long as I didn't have to watch him and his partner holding hands or kissing me. I would just treat him like my son's close friend, but I just wouldn't want to have to watch the intimacy stuff.

First bolded, I've had straight friends make out aggressively and be extremely inappropriate as well. It makes me uncomfortable when anyone does this, gay or straight. It's not a gay thing, so don't kid yourself.

Second bolded, my parents did this for 10 years. I came out at 16, they were generally accepting of it. They still loved and treated me the same but anytime I brought my girlfriend over she was my "friend". My dad never looked her in the eyes. When I got older and got an apartment with my girlfriend then she was my "roommate". This is what made me feel ashamed, not the fact that I was gay. It was the fact that it felt my parents were ashamed of me. I would never wish that feeling upon anyone, especially my own child.

With my situation, I believe that my parents were just trying to get used to it, they grew up in a time that it was not accepted or talked about, at all. Now, they have great relationships with my partners. They even helped plan what was going to be my wedding, because they evolved. I hope some day you to do too.

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by dmbetc

First bolded, I've had straight friends make out aggressively and be extremely inappropriate as well. It makes me uncomfortable when anyone does this, gay or straight. It's not a gay thing, so don't kid yourself.

Second bolded, my parents did this for 10 years. I came out at 16, they were generally accepting of it. They still loved and treated me the same but anytime I brought my girlfriend over she was my "friend". My dad never looked her in the eyes. When I got older and got an apartment with my girlfriend then she was my "roommate". This is what made me feel ashamed, not the fact that I was gay. It was the fact that it felt my parents were ashamed of me. I would never wish that feeling upon anyone, especially my own child.

With my situation, I believe that my parents were just trying to get used to it, they grew up in a time that it was not accepted or talked about, at all. Now, they have great relationships with my partners. They even helped plan what was going to be my wedding, because they evolved. I hope some day you to do too.

By your use of this word I assume you're suggesting that my feelings on the matter are somehow primitive or I'm not socially well-aligned because I'm not 100% on board with homosexuality? I've already stated I'm pro-gay rights, I'm just not personally comfortable with doing it in person.

As to the making out thing, yes it's awkward when straight couples do it, it's just amplified when it's two men.

[Tiduwho]

Originally Posted by 1yankeesfan

I have two daughters and I would be upset just because of the things they'd have to go through, but I would love and support them regardless. I just want them to be happy with who they are and be proud of who they are. It doesn't much matter to me as long as they are happy.

This pretty much.

[barbogast]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

By your use of this word I assume you're suggesting that my feelings on the matter are somehow primitive or I'm not socially well-aligned because I'm not 100% on board with homosexuality? I've already stated I'm pro-gay rights, I'm just not personally comfortable with doing it in person.

As to the making out thing, yes it's awkward when straight couples do it, it's just amplified when it's two men.

It's not amplified at all unless you're one that thinks that gay people kissing is icky. To those of us who don't think that way, seeing excessive PDA by anyone is annoying and kind of awkward.

[barbogast]

I also question how many people in this thread that find gay men kissing to be yucky have enjoyed lesbian porn before. Because I'm gonna guess it's all of them.

[dmbetc]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

By your use of this word I assume you're suggesting that my feelings on the matter are somehow primitive or I'm not socially well-aligned because I'm not 100% on board with homosexuality? I've already stated I'm pro-gay rights, I'm just not personally comfortable with doing it in person.

As to the making out thing, yes it's awkward when straight couples do it, it's just amplified when it's two men.

Yes, they are primitive because you have said if your son is gay you would treat the person they LOVE as a friend. That's not accepting or pro-gay rights at all.

[barbogast]

Originally Posted by dmbetc

Yes, they are primitive because you have said if your son is gay you would treat the person they LOVE as a friend. That's not accepting or pro-gay rights at all.

well said

A partner, whether a gay or straight partner, is not a "friend". It is offensive to treat them as such.

[dmbetc]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

By your use of this word I assume you're suggesting that my feelings on the matter are somehow primitive or I'm not socially well-aligned because I'm not 100% on board with homosexuality? I've already stated I'm pro-gay rights, I'm just not personally comfortable with doing it in person.

As to the making out thing, yes it's awkward when straight couples do it, it's just amplified when it's two men.

Also, what would you do when he marries his partner? Would you be involved in the wedding? Stand proud with your son as he marries his male friend? Look away in shame as they share their first kiss as husbands? Tell your buddies this is your sons friend who he married cause they have a good friendship? Would you call him your son in law?

You can't be half accepting. You either are, or you aren't. Doesn't sound like you are.

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by dmbetc

Also, what would you do when he marries his partner? Would you be involved in the wedding? Stand proud with your son as he marries his male friend? Look away in shame as they share their first kiss as husbands? Tell your buddies this is your sons friend who he married cause they have a good friendship? Would you call him your son in law?

You can't be half accepting. You either are, or you aren't. Doesn't sound like you are.

There's a difference between acceptance and tolerance. I would tolerate his actions; I wouldn't accept them. If my gay son were to be married I would probably want to kill myself the entire time but then I would go home and shrug it off.

Homosexuality is a character trait and doesn't define a person; I view it much in the same way that people otherwise display annoying/offensive behavior (excessive gossip, telling crude jokes, whatever it may be). I would prefer not to be around people that make me uncomfortable, I don't see why that's such an outlandish thing to say. I don't think gay people shouldn't have the same rights as heterosexuals, they're still people.

I have friends that are gay, when they don't act flamboyantly gay or say gay stuff, I like their company. If my son was gay I would love every aspect about him except his sexuality. I'm sure I do plenty of annoying shit my parents don't like, I don't hate them for it or think they're primitive because of it.

[scoobyc]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

There's a difference between acceptance and tolerance. I would tolerate his actions; I wouldn't accept them. If my gay son were to be married I would probably want to kill myself the entire time but then I would go home and shrug it off.

Homosexuality is a character trait and doesn't define a person; I view it much in the same way that people otherwise display annoying/offensive behavior (excessive gossip, telling crude jokes, whatever it may be). I would prefer not to be around people that make me uncomfortable, I don't see why that's such an outlandish thing to say. I don't think gay people shouldn't have the same rights as heterosexuals, they're still people.

I have friends that are gay, when they don't act flamboyantly gay or say gay stuff, I like their company. If my son was gay I would love every aspect about him except his sexuality. I'm sure I do plenty of annoying shit my parents don't like, I don't hate them for it or think they're primitive because of it.

You would be doing everybody a favor.

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by scoobyc

You would be doing everybody a favor.

Well that's not very tolerant of you, is it? You should be shamed for having an opinion about someone!

[barbogast]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

There's a difference between acceptance and tolerance. I would tolerate his actions; I wouldn't accept them. If my gay son were to be married I would probably want to kill myself the entire time but then I would go home and shrug it off.

Homosexuality is a character trait and doesn't define a person; I view it much in the same way that people otherwise display annoying/offensive behavior (excessive gossip, telling crude jokes, whatever it may be). I would prefer not to be around people that make me uncomfortable, I don't see why that's such an outlandish thing to say. I don't think gay people shouldn't have the same rights as heterosexuals, they're still people.

I have friends that are gay, when they don't act flamboyantly gay or say gay stuff, I like their company. If my son was gay I would love every aspect about him except his sexuality. I'm sure I do plenty of annoying shit my parents don't like, I don't hate them for it or think they're primitive because of it.

The difference is whatever it is you "do" that your parents don't like surely isn't something as innocent as having a sexuality.

[dmbetc]

You sneeze too loud!! Ugh, it's the same thing as being gay!!

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by dmbetc

You sneeze too loud!! Ugh, it's the same thing as being gay!!

Absolute classic Ants post. Encounter an opinion not perfectly aligned with your own and make a bad joke attempting to oversimplify the other person's position based off one sentence in a multiple-paragraph post.

[dmbetc]

Sneezing loudly is an annoying behavior to me. And you look at all annoying behaviors the same. And you think someones sexuality that isn't the same as yours is annoying. Not sure the issue here.

[barbogast]

Seriously though bud, you basically said being gay is an "annoying habit". That's absolutely ridiculous.

[ExistenceNow]

Originally Posted by scrock25

Yeah, so?

What if?

Nailed it.

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by barbogast

Seriously though bud, you basically said being gay is an "annoying habit". That's absolutely ridiculous.

No I didn't.

I'm not homophobic, I just don't want my kid to be gay. Not sure what the big deal here is. The OP posed a question, so I answered honestly.

[barbogast]

Originally Posted by M. Steng

No I didn't.

Really?

Originally Posted by M. Steng

I view it much in the same way that people otherwise display annoying/offensive behavior (excessive gossip, telling crude jokes, whatever it may be).

Hmmm...

[dmbetc]

[M. Steng]

Originally Posted by barbogast

Really?



Hmmm...

A habit is different than a character trait. Didn't think that even needed explanation.