Originally Posted by Rodey
Spot on to the bolded. That's pretty much her and pretty much how she has explained it to me. I am just having to learn myself how to deal with it, because I've never dated a true introvert and I actually got a full taste of it because we had to be around each other.
a lot of people aren't used to it and don't know what to do because they are used to extroverts. introverts only make up like 1/3 of the population, so everything from school to work (most jobs, not all) to social relationships are all geared towards how extroverts act and respond, which makes introverts uncomfortable and unable to use their strengths.
if she comes home from work and is tired (especially if she has a job where she is forced to interact with people all day, like sales), then order take out (or cook something yourself), hop on netflix, and just let her lay next to you while you watch a movie. she needs time to recharge her batteries, which usually means not interacting with any more people, including you. she'll appreciate being able to spend her quiet time with you if you can learn to be quiet.
and as for the selectively social thing, the way i said that makes it sound like we're incredibly full of ourselves
what i meant by people we "approve of" is people we are comfortable being around, especially if you happen to not be there, even if its just to run to the bathroom. being in a room full of people we don't know is incredibly uncomfortable for us, so we tend to stick around whoever we do know. and if that someone disappears, then we are stuck by ourselves.
so if you're ever at like a work event, friend's wedding, or something like that where its a bunch of people you know that she doesn't, keep her by your side as much as possible, or better yet, let her stay home if she doesn't like the idea of going and doesn't need to be there. if you do have to part from her for a little bit, make sure you leave her in good company with someone you trust, and hopefully someone she was able to get to know a bit before you left.
you can also use this to your advantage a bit. it won't be hard to get guys nights, because she likely wouldn't want to go anyway. don't take advantage of it too much though. it also works well when there is something she wants to do by herself, like writing, reading, or if she has some girlfriends who will come over.
but like i said before, look up some articles about introversion and how we act. those buzzfeed-esque lists are usually pretty accurate too. they'll help you get a better idea of how she works. and if you have any questions, you can just ask me. PM probably works better as i don't always visit this thread.