Dating is miserable

[thechad90000]

Well evidently I've developed a crush on a friend of mine. Fucking wonderful. I might as well just hit myself in the nuts with a hammer

[UrsadonDMB]

Some feelings came back with an old fling of mine back in December. Asked her on a date and she said yes, date went well. Planned a second date, but had to raincheck because she had work/went back to school. We were talking pretty much every day after for a couple months but she started getting distant a couple weeks ago. Now I am pretty sure she is dating someone else, after I got her flowers for vday and did something pretty awesome for her bday. The raincheck date was supposed to be next week, and i'm sure i'll still see her. I hate long distance but she is one of my few exceptions.

[Alazais]

All Moved in. It went reasonably well. I don't think any move can be without some sort of tension but nothing out of hand. The next time we move I think the best approach is to tackle separate rooms and organize it however you want instead of doing each room together. Too many opportunities to argue over things.

We have everything set up outside of the kitchen and dining room (Our apartment has a dining room and living room/loft. It's pretty fantastic). Over the next few months i'm going to try and purchase enough gear for a recording studio and I'll set it up in the corner of the loft. I'm quite excited about it. It's really nice and comforting to have my own space again. Picturing and Kitchen get organized tonight and then tomorrow is the dining room.

I've got to look into buying a bar of some sort. My original thought was to buy a bunch of really old looking crates and fasten them to the wall, organize them in a cool way and then set up my bar in that. It would look really cool.

Any thoughts/options on a bar? my ceiling for this is about $500.

Best,

[Roose13]

Originally Posted by thechad90000

Well evidently I've developed a crush on a friend of mine. Fucking wonderful. I might as well just hit myself in the nuts with a hammer

I went through that. It's tough, especially if you have doubts she's interested back. Is she interested?

[thechad90000]

Originally Posted by Roose13

I went through that. It's tough, especially if you have doubts she's interested back. Is she interested?

I do not think she is though we are pretty flirtatious when hanging out and I've had others confirm to me that they think she's interested. However, I know that she's also sort of seeing another one my friends right now (a drunk confession from her, I and just one other person are the only people who know). So I'm not going to pursue anything or do anything about it and just get over it basically. That's my plan.

Just kind of sucks.

[UrsadonDMB]

Originally Posted by thechad90000

I do not think she is though we are pretty flirtatious when hanging out and I've had others confirm to me that they think she's interested. However, I know that she's also sort of seeing another one my friends right now (a drunk confession from her, I and just one other person are the only people who know). So I'm not going to pursue anything or do anything about it and just get over it basically. That's my plan.

Just kind of sucks.

Been there more than once. Kinda going through it now, it can be hard living.

[thechad90000]

Originally Posted by UrsadonDMB

Been there more than once. Kinda going through it now, it can be hard living.

Yeah, haven't had this sort of thing going on since high school. I forgot how shitty it is. The only sensible thing to do though is get over it, drink a little, and down the road, if an opportunity arises, reassess the situation.

[lockman21]

So let me give you guys an update on my current situation:

As recently as a week ago, I had four different women that I was talking to/going on dates with/etc. One was a friend of mine's cousin that lives in Atlanta (I live in Chicago), another was a girl I met, the third was a girl I kind of dated about two years ago and started talking to again, and the fourth is (see if you can follow this) my best friend's wife's sister-in-law's sister.

I just cut it off with the girl I used to date. That was a bad idea from the beginning. I wouldn't really consider her an "ex", we "dated" for like 2-3 months a couple years ago, it never was anything serious. Just a bad idea.

Anyway, so there are these other three. I'm going to cut it off with Atlanta girl, because that's just not a good idea. Long distance and she's a little crazy. Story time...one time a couple weeks ago I was talking to her, and in passing referred to her boss as "he" (I think I said, "oh man, was he pissed at you?"). We've never had a conversation about her boss nor did I have any idea who he/she was. Her response was "Um, ok, that's incredibly sexist to assume my boss is a male. My boss is a woman, and she's the baddest bitch in Atlanta." REALLY? So that was a tipping point for me to slowly end things.

So we're left with two. And I don't know which one I like better. They're both drop dead gorgeous...like, really gorgeous. One is shitty about communicating and one is a little weird.

Women, man. None of them are easy.

[Alazais]

The wife sister thing is a no go. Unless you plan to make it a long term thing you're in trouble if that fizzles out. It's to close to home, man.

[UrsadonDMB]

Hey at least you narrowed it down to two! Give it a little more time and I would bet you find the lesser of the two evils.

Got a text last night from the girl I am seeing next week, turns out she mailed me a bday card but it was sent back to her since she wrote the wrong address down. Kinda hoping she writes something in the card that will shed a little light on where we are at. Honestly thought she forgot to send me something, even though she has sent me something the past two years.

[Nick@Night]

Originally Posted by lockman21

So let me give you guys an update on my current situation:

As recently as a week ago, I had four different women that I was talking to/going on dates with/etc. One was a friend of mine's cousin that lives in Atlanta (I live in Chicago), another was a girl I met, the third was a girl I kind of dated about two years ago and started talking to again, and the fourth is (see if you can follow this) my best friend's wife's sister-in-law's sister.

I just cut it off with the girl I used to date. That was a bad idea from the beginning. I wouldn't really consider her an "ex", we "dated" for like 2-3 months a couple years ago, it never was anything serious. Just a bad idea.

Anyway, so there are these other three. I'm going to cut it off with Atlanta girl, because that's just not a good idea. Long distance and she's a little crazy. Story time...one time a couple weeks ago I was talking to her, and in passing referred to her boss as "he" (I think I said, "oh man, was he pissed at you?"). We've never had a conversation about her boss nor did I have any idea who he/she was. Her response was "Um, ok, that's incredibly sexist to assume my boss is a male. My boss is a woman, and she's the baddest bitch in Atlanta." REALLY? So that was a tipping point for me to slowly end things.

So we're left with two. And I don't know which one I like better. They're both drop dead gorgeous...like, really gorgeous. One is shitty about communicating and one is a little weird.

Women, man. None of them are easy.

In your opening, you kind of just described the goalie situation the Florida Panthers went through last night. That was also tough to follow.

[lockman21]

Originally Posted by Alazais

The wife sister thing is a no go. Unless you plan to make it a long term thing you're in trouble if that fizzles out. It's to close to home, man.

It's not as close of a relation as you'd probably expect. The best friend's wife likes me better than her sister in law, by a long shot, but she set me up with her sister-in-law's sister because she's actually really cool.

I'm over the whole dating for no reason thing, I've done it plenty. So if I did anything, it'd be for real. I'm meeting up with her tomorrow, we'll see how it goes.

[lockman21]

Originally Posted by Nick@Night

In your opening, you kind of just described the goalie situation the Florida Panthers went through last night. That was also tough to follow.

By the end of it, I felt like Luongo had to. Just limping back out there.

Trust me, it's been just as hard to keep 4 people straight as well. I kept mixing up who I talked to about certain stories, and who told me certain things...it was impossible to keep straight.

Not to mention having not not forget to text/call each one. Too much.

[redsox14]

Originally Posted by lockman21

By the end of it, I felt like Luongo had to. Just limping back out there.

Trust me, it's been just as hard to keep 4 people straight as well. I kept mixing up who I talked to about certain stories, and who told me certain things...it was impossible to keep straight.

Not to mention having not not forget to text/call each one. Too much.

I have trouble enough keeping things straight with 2 people nevermind 4

Glad you're narrowing it down! I say keep dating the 2 for a few weeks and like someone else said, you'll figure it out.

[cry_minarets458]

Troy, glad to hear the move went without any death or crazy frustration

lockman, just do whatever feels natural to you, I guess. Women are hard, you're absolutely correct. I'm about all ready to give up after my recent week of dating.

Jen, hi.


I went on a date with a woman last week who decided to share her partner count with me. This is how the conversation went. We were at an Brazilian restaurant so things were pretty spicy to begin with. I've never eaten Brazilian before, so I was dying.

Me: Man, this food is spicy.
Her: So, do you want to know how many people I had sex with?
Me: No, I absolutely do not. I will judge based on what you decide to share.
Her: (Number higher than 60.)
Me: *cough* Oh, well thank you. I thought I just choked on this meat spear, care to help me out as you have so much experience with meat spears?

Like jesus Christ, I said no.

[dmbetc]

Well...did she help you out with your meat spear?

[UrsadonDMB]

So now its a number higher than 61 right?

[cry_minarets458]

I did NOT want my junk to fall off shortly afterward, so no, I am not part of that small community of people.

[Roose13]

You probably could have just walked right in there, felt around for a bit and called it a night.

[AllifromOhio]

Passed the two year mark last month. Things are going well. Who knew relationships could be easy?

[cry_minarets458]

Fuck you and your happiness


I kid, I kid. Congrats!

[sbuzzz]

Originally Posted by AllifromOhio

Passed the two year mark last month. Things are going well. Who knew relationships could be easy?

Jinx and

[AllifromOhio]

Originally Posted by sbuzzz

Jinx and

It probably is a jinx. I'll be back here in a month complaining and plowing through guys again.
Feels weird to write something positive.

[thechad90000]

Good job Alli!

[dmbbearcat]

Is this weird to anyone else, or is it just me? My girlfriend is in grad school and about to start a residency in the summer, and is very careful about what she posts to social media, as she should be. She said she won't really ever post pictures of the two of us to Facebook, because she doesn't want potential employers to ask questions or dig into her personal life. Totally cool. Well right now she's in Denver on vacation with a bunch of people from her program, and not only posted a photo with two guys from her program, but she made it her cover photo. Typically I wouldn't care, but when you say that you won't post pics with me and then turn around and do it with two guys who aren't your boyfriend, I find that a little weird.

Is that justified or not? I guess it's only Facebook, but it's still weird to me.

[AllifromOhio]

I find that to be very weird.


Slightly related, I find it very weird when people keep their old profile pictures with their ex from a long time ago. Not like their current profile picture but the ones you see when you click the box and click through the pictures.

[thechad90000]

Yeah I think that's totally weird.

[dmbbearcat]

Glad I'm not alone. I mentioned it to her and she got upset. Figures.

[rconverse]

Originally Posted by dmbbearcat

Glad I'm not alone. I mentioned it to her and she got upset. Figures.

First off, Facebook is serious business.

Second, typically that's because they're deflecting their poor behavior back on you. I dated a girl that had my mind so fucked up, I thought the sky was yellow. (I'm not even kidding. I was already through college and she convinced me that, at a major university, there were no parties because it was a dry campus and that's why we never went out on campus.)

My first question would be: Did she give you any reasonable response as to why she is super careful about posting pictures of you on Facebook and not these two guys? Actually, that's my only question.

I get the idea of protecting her identity on Facebook or not wanting future employers to pry into her life or whatever but, generally speaking, no one sees a picture of a guy and a girl and feels the need to dig into their personal life for employment reasons. Just saying. Kind of sounds like she's trying to convince you there are no parties at school.

[dmbbearcat]

She is about as angry as I've ever made her. I mean, I know these two guys and I know they are just her friends, so I really don't care that it's them. She just seems inconsistent with her reasoning. She said that I "need to be more secure with our relationship." She also claims that she never said that she wouldn't post pics of us two, we just don't take them. I know that's a lie, but I'm going to quit while I'm behind. She said she can't wait to take pics of us next weekend at a black tie event we're attending. We will see.

When it comes down to it, it's fucking Facebook and photos. I'm not weirded out by the pics. I only called her out on her inconsistent reasoning. Wrong move, apparently. Relationships are weird.