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Old 06-03-2009, 07:57 AM   #1
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DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

This was posted yesterday, but I thought it deserved it's own thread. So hilarious.

http://blogs.suntimes.com/derogatis/...g_whiskey.html
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  • Old 06-03-2009, 07:59 AM   #2
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Jim,
    Just because you are fat,ugly, and wouldn't know a lyric about SEX if it bit you in your masturbating right HAND, doesn't mean that the rest of us don't enjoy Dave Matthews Band. The BONEHEADED south African has made more money than YOUR FAT ASS can eat in HOT POCKETS. Thank You for being a great example of a booger eating mamas boy who lives in his parents basement and plays world of warcraft while writing bad reviews out of pure spite.
    Have a great day, and enjoy your s---ty life,


    best post in the whole bunch..that shit is hilarious.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:02 AM   #3
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    The best one!!

    Jim,

    Just because you are fat,ugly, and wouldn't know a lyric about SEX if it bit you in your masturbating right HAND, doesn't mean that the rest of us don't enjoy Dave Matthews Band. The BONEHEADED south African has made more money than YOUR FAT ASS can eat in HOT POCKETS. Thank You for being a great example of a booger eating mamas boy who lives in his parents basement and plays world of warcraft while writing bad reviews out of pure spite.

    Have a great day, and enjoy your s---ty life,
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:02 AM   #4
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by canes101190 View Post
    Jim,
    Just because you are fat,ugly, and wouldn't know a lyric about SEX if it bit you in your masturbating right HAND, doesn't mean that the rest of us don't enjoy Dave Matthews Band. The BONEHEADED south African has made more money than YOUR FAT ASS can eat in HOT POCKETS. Thank You for being a great example of a booger eating mamas boy who lives in his parents basement and plays world of warcraft while writing bad reviews out of pure spite.
    Have a great day, and enjoy your s---ty life,


    best post in the whole bunch..that shit is hilarious.
    Damn u beat me to it!!
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:06 AM   #5
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Being from Chicago, I've been reading DeRogatis for years, and the guy is just a complete hack. Speaking as someone with a degree in Journalism, its a damn shame that this guy is still allowed to be called a music 'critic'. Being a good critic means being able to listen to music and judge it objectively on its own merits, regardless of any pre-conceived bias or opinion about the artist in question, and that's the exact opposite of what he does here.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:07 AM   #6
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    I could SOMEWHAT respect his opinion as someone who obviously just didn't like the Band. Some people don't and that's OK. But this guy lost all respect when he said this...

    "The South African native is still a bonehead when it comes to writing lyrics"

    I think we can all agree that some lyrics are more simple than others, but how do you listen to a song like Squirm or Why I Am or Lying In The Hands Of God and say that he's a bone head when writing lyrics. The reviewer is a presumptuous prick who is jealous that dMb is more popular and more well liked than he is.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:07 AM   #7
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    I think this one may be my favorite:
    Though 3 lite-beer-swilling fans disagree--his articles reportedly have grossed more than four dollars--Jim DeRogatis always has been better on the toilet than on the page, where the endless wank-fest(period) could be a torture far worse than waterboarding. That isn't to say that any of the "critic's" previous articles are good, just that they're more pleasurable/less offensive than his bathroom sessions, with hybrid bias-laziness-moronic reviews and overall crappy writing easily digested while sipping a latte (a sentence that makes no sense). The "critic's" new article continues this tradition, and it may even be the "critic's" worst moment on record (which is saying a lot).

    Named for the album being reviewed, "Big Whiskey and the GrooGrux King" is an review that shouldn't have happened: Even before the DeRogatis listened to the album, the "critic" debated whether to write a review, having lost much of his drive and acquired considerable personal acrimony toward himself over the last decade of easy but lucrative chooglin'. Ultimately he decided to give it one more try, retreating to some lonely and isolated cubicle at the Sun Times building and the combination of an uncertain future and the loss of any ability to write or listen critically to good music early in the sessions seemed to not have rekindled a "good-writing" spark artfully fanned by whomever his editor was; who kept things concise, unfocused and mostly fact-free, with an emphasis on those lazy but catchy sentences and opinions that are DeRogatis' specialty.

    The native of (who cares) is still a bonehead when it comes to writing articles, which fall either in the categories of 4th grade banality (insert any part of any article he's written), coffee-mug philosophizing (I doubt DeRogatis is capable of even "coffee-mug phlosophy") or frat-house sex talk ("wank-fest"). But if you toss his article in the rotation on your toliet paper roll for your own next bathroom session as a nod to those friends who only read mindless dribble, and you ignore what ol' DeRogatis is writing about, at least you can get a pretty good wipe at yesterday's lunch.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:08 AM   #8
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    well in his defense....


    wait, no. that was an absolutely abysmal review that was more an attack on DMB in general than a review of the cd. I bet you he went to a show once when he was 16. and that he still has zits.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:09 AM   #9
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    i just took part in the bashing
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:10 AM   #10
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    he's always been an ass - nothing new here - ask a ryan adams fan about derogatis (and duck)
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:11 AM   #11
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by AlexK79 View Post
    Being from Chicago, I've been reading DeRogatis for years, and the guy is just a complete hack. Speaking as someone with a degree in Journalism, its a damn shame that this guy is still allowed to be called a music 'critic'. Being a good critic means being able to listen to music and judge it objectively on its own merits, regardless of any pre-conceived bias or opinion about the artist in question, and that's the exact opposite of what he does here.
    The sad thing, is that this guy is just one of many who 'critique' (poorly) in this fashion.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:14 AM   #12
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Well if want to add to the absolute ripping of this d-bag, email him. Lol, what a complete waste of space....I don't know how people like him have jobs.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:14 AM   #13
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    not acknowledging this POS and his review would have been better than giving him all of this attention
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:15 AM   #14
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Aurelie View Post
    I think this one may be my favorite:
    Though 3 lite-beer-swilling fans disagree--his articles reportedly have grossed more than four dollars--Jim DeRogatis always has been better on the toilet than on the page, where the endless wank-fest(period) could be a torture far worse than waterboarding. That isn't to say that any of the "critic's" previous articles are good, just that they're more pleasurable/less offensive than his bathroom sessions, with hybrid bias-laziness-moronic reviews and overall crappy writing easily digested while sipping a latte (a sentence that makes no sense). The "critic's" new article continues this tradition, and it may even be the "critic's" worst moment on record (which is saying a lot).

    Named for the album being reviewed, "Big Whiskey and the GrooGrux King" is an review that shouldn't have happened: Even before the DeRogatis listened to the album, the "critic" debated whether to write a review, having lost much of his drive and acquired considerable personal acrimony toward himself over the last decade of easy but lucrative chooglin'. Ultimately he decided to give it one more try, retreating to some lonely and isolated cubicle at the Sun Times building and the combination of an uncertain future and the loss of any ability to write or listen critically to good music early in the sessions seemed to not have rekindled a "good-writing" spark artfully fanned by whomever his editor was; who kept things concise, unfocused and mostly fact-free, with an emphasis on those lazy but catchy sentences and opinions that are DeRogatis' specialty.

    The native of (who cares) is still a bonehead when it comes to writing articles, which fall either in the categories of 4th grade banality (insert any part of any article he's written), coffee-mug philosophizing (I doubt DeRogatis is capable of even "coffee-mug phlosophy") or frat-house sex talk ("wank-fest"). But if you toss his article in the rotation on your toliet paper roll for your own next bathroom session as a nod to those friends who only read mindless dribble, and you ignore what ol' DeRogatis is writing about, at least you can get a pretty good wipe at yesterday's lunch.
    Thanks!
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:17 AM   #15
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Ryan Adams has destroyed this reviewer too:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yoTUXBbaFjE
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:19 AM   #16
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    You guys are giving us a bad name.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:19 AM   #17
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    lol...

    By Brett on June 2, 2009 3:40 PM
    if this CD was released with a side of fries you would like it better, huh?


    I think that one has my vote.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:19 AM   #18
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    LOL

    By the dude on June 2, 2009 2:22 PM

    Dear Jim,
    I don't like you
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:20 AM   #19
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    if this CD was released with a side of fries you would like it better, huh?




    oh my god this is gold
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:20 AM   #20
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    this was the same guy who worked for rolling stone and sparked all the heat between them and DMB with similarly stupid comments
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:20 AM   #21
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    I just found my entertainment for the day. That was hilarious! that reviewer is an arrogant jackass. Scroll down about half the page and there is a link to his picture....he looks like he had a few too many doughnuts in his day.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:21 AM   #22
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    this was my favorite reply to that review:

    "if this CD was released with a side of fries you would like it better, huh?"


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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:21 AM   #23
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    this is my favorite one
    Dear Jim,
    You wouldn't know good music if it slapped you in the face with a side of mustard and relish you fat f---. With that being said, go do yourself a favor and goto Wrigley to watch the Cubs get fisted and choke on a hot dog as you swallow it whole. Next time you have a deadline for a review, please do some research on the topic (or get fired).
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:23 AM   #24
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    the comments are gold. GOLD, jerry!
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:23 AM   #25
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    I bet this dude is still a virgin.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:24 AM   #26
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/img/review/000421/jim_l.jpg


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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:25 AM   #27
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by TheLastStop123 View Post
    I bet this dude is still a virgin.
    Yep, he's never seen a vagina.

    Or his own penis for that matter.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:25 AM   #28
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    HA, he gave Sonic Youth 3.5..... this guys is deaf.
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:27 AM   #29
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    there are some classic comments in there
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    Old 06-03-2009, 08:27 AM   #30
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    Re: DMB fans absolutely destroying Sun Times reviewer

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by TheLastStop123 View Post
    I bet this dude is still a virgin.
    This is really mean... But really funny...

    By Kyle on June 2, 2009 6:09 PM

    And I'm suppose to take someone who looks like this seriously....hahahahahahahahaha

    http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/img/review/000421/jim_l.jpg
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