As someone who's been away from DMB groups for 10+ years, I picked a HELL of a great first thread to read in the "Epic" section! Great reading, and actually I loved the weaving evolution of the discussion.
A few things to note/add since I read through the whole thing:
1. OP is himself epic. Protective brother, great sense of humor, and the right mix of naive & totally seeing what's going on. Well done OP, if you're still around
2. It took me awhile to figure out the link to see what OP's l'il sis looked like, but honestly the moment I saw a bunch of pics (particularly the one where she's got side shaved head and green longer hair on top, and the tats) I was like "Oh HELL yes I see why she stood out and why Dave was like "I wanna talk to HER!" I would never claim to be sure about his intention because, how can anyone be sure? But I absolutely positively have spent enough time around them to know that even a happily married guy with kids who sings about sex in 80% of the songs and tours incessantly is THRILLED to have the chance to just connect with (non-sexually is the way I mean "connect") someone who just looks interesting, not manic, and maybe has a gleam in her eye.
3. On the whole age thing, I do think if he wasn't truly planning on trying to do anything that the age thing is less of an issue. She's pretty, looks super interesting, and probably looked into it but not manic. Her being 18... a) maybe she looks older (I'm not good at judging that); and b) if it's really just to meet a very interesting looking fan, age isn't really that big a deal.
4. You guys are hysterical, there are some truly epic lines in this thread, so thank you for a great way to end a hard week!
5. And the musings about cheating and the Sleaze scale (is that what it was called? It was already pages ago, you know what I mean) are fascinating!
6. And one more compelling point about OP's sis that, it's understandable that no one picked up on it, but if you either think about all Dave's stories, or if you've just spent a bit of time around him, you'd KNOW that the fact that she seems to have studied EMBALMING would practically make him propose to her on the spot! Ok, not propose, him already being married and all, but anyone who deals with dead bodies is going to be a point of further interest for him. And if she's hot in her way... look out! And I say all that as a woman who has never embalmed anything and who never got to benefit from the "Hey, I studied mortuary science" angle but saw it work wonders for a few women to have very engaged convos with The Man.
Fun stuff, thanks for the great read!